The number of people who are at risk of serious health problems due to bei g overweight is increasing What is the reason for the growth in overweight people in society? How can this problem be solved?

#people #risk #health #bei #g #reason #growth #society

It is a worldwide issue that, especially in these days, the overwhelmingly rising numbers of people are suffering from several health issues and diseases resulting from obesity. And

this by

Accept comma addition

this, by

the way alerts governments to immediately take action against

this

issue. In

this

essay I will try to give some more information about potential causes and suggest some relevant solutions

Accept space

First

of all, it is vital to emphasize that, nowadays more and more people are adding some kinds of harmful fast food and snacks into their diet. As a consequence the level of

colesterine

an animal sterol that is normally synthesized by the liver; the most abundant steroid in animal tissues

cholesterol

in their blood is likely to grow by the way narrowing blood vessels and raising its pressure.

Therefore

, they are at risk of suffering from numerous problems with circulatory

system including

Accept comma addition

system, including

heart attack and multiple sclerosis. With the aim of addressing

this

matter government leaders should work more on raising taxes on junk food and giving detailed information in

this

field in order to increase public awareness A

second

problem lies

Suggestion

with

people

Suggestion

the people

themselves. What I mean by

this

is that, thanks to the rapidly developing modern

technogy

the practical application of science to commerce or industry

technology

citizens are now allowed to move less as the significant proportion of their work is done by several gadgets and robotics.

Hence

, the amount of calories taken through the consumption of food

outweights

be heavier than

outweighs

the sum which is burned

Suggestion

during

daily activities. The solution is for the government to arrange some sport facilities and encourage inhabitants to exercise on a daily basis. To take all the information which was given above into consideration, it seems

really vulnerable issue

Suggestion

a really vulnerable issue

that a number of people with several illnesses caused by extra weight is constantly piling up. So it is a case in which some extra effort is needed

feom

a giver or sender

from

the government leaders and the population itself.

Submitted by turdiboyevyorqinbek481 on Fri Apr 10 2020

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

296 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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The number of people who are at risk of serious health problems due to bei g overweight is increasing What is the reason for the growth in overweight people in society? How can this problem be solved?

Fully explain your ideas

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

You have a full time job and also doing part time evening course, You now find that you can not continue the course. Write a letter to your tutor. -Describe the situation. -Explain why you can not continue at this time. -Say what action you would like to take.

Some people believe that education is important to get jobs while others believe it its experience and skills. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Nowadays many students choose to study abroad at university level. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of studying abroad, and give your own opinion about whether it is a good idea.

In some countries, the numbers of children aged 15 and younger are increasing constantly. What are the current and future effects of an ever-increasing population?

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+