Write a letter to the local school in your neighborhood to give suggestions about improving its buildings and play area. Include Why they should be improved Suggestions for how When they could be improved

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Dear Sir or Madam, I am Jaspreet Kaur and I lives at

the

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apply

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6341 173a Street, Surrey BC, which is close near to your

school

Use synonyms

. I am writing

this

Linking Words

letter to suggest some improvements regarding the

school

Use synonyms

building and the playground. I hope you will take my suggestions in a positive way and make the desired amendments to improve the infrastructure of the

school

Use synonyms

. My daughter is in grade five at your

school

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. Recently, she got

fever

Correct article usage

a fever

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and running nose because of the heating issues in the

school

Use synonyms

building. I talked with the other parents and they are

also

Linking Words

claiming that their kids are facing

such

Linking Words

issues due to

lack

Correct article usage

the lack

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of heating facilities in the building.

Additionally

Linking Words

, some of the rides in the play zone

are

Correct your spelling

area

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the

Correct article usage

apply

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faulty condition, despite we are paying extra sports fees to the

school

Use synonyms

separately. I thought

this

Linking Words

matter requires your urgent attention.

Therefore

Linking Words

, I want you to install a new furnace in the building as soon as possible, so that, kids

don

Correct your spelling

show examples

not have to face the same problem again.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, I

also

Linking Words

want you to consider upgrading the

playzone’s

Correct your spelling

play zones

play zone's

toys because they are essential for the development of

Add an article

the child

a child

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child

Fix the agreement mistake

children

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. I hope you will get it done as soon as possible. I along with the other neighbours have decided that we would give you two months to work on it and if the problem is still not fixed, we would report it to the higher level. I look forward

hearing

Change preposition

to hearing

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from you. Yours Faithfully, Jaspreet Kaur

Tue Apr 14 2020

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

8 paragraphs

253 words

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Write a letter to the local school in your neighborhood to give suggestions about improving its buildings and play area. Include Why they should be improved Suggestions for how When they could be improved

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Many customs and traditional ways of behavior are no longer relevant to the modern life and not worth keeping. Do you agree or disagree?

Are you for or against international trade?

Economic progress is not the only way to measure the success of a country. What other factors do you think there are in measuring the success of a country? Which do you think is the most important factor?

IN SOME COUNTRIES, THERE HAS BEEN AN INCREASE IN THE NUMBER OF PARENTS WHO ARE CHOOSING TO EDUCATE THEIR CHILDREN THEMSELVES AT HOME INSTEAD OF SENDING THEM TO SCHOOL. DO THE ADVANTAGES OF HOME EDUCATION OUTWEIGH THE DISADVANTAGES.