IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Today more people are travelling than ever before. Why is this the case? What are the benefits of travelling for the travelers?

#people #case #travelers
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Life starts out of your comfort zone. Travelling is one of those activities which pull you out of your comfort zone and offer
great opportunity
Suggestion
a great opportunity
 to learn and explore. These
days
Suggestion
day
Use synonyms
culture
Suggestion
cultures
 of domestic and international excursion is getting popular as compared to
past
Suggestion
the past
. In
this
Linking Words
 essay I will discuss reasons of
this
Linking Words
 change and associated benefits.
Firstly
Linking Words
, if we compare today with
past
Suggestion
the past
, travelling has become easy. Now, we have more mode of commute and variety of options available.
For
Linking Words
example if
Accept comma addition
example, if
 you want to
travel
Use synonyms
 from Pakistan to India. You can go via plane, ship, train, bus or even
on
Suggestion
in
 your own car, after acquiring all necessary permits. In each option you have
choice
Suggestion
a choice
the choice
 of
travel
Use synonyms
 alone or if you need
company
Suggestion
a company
 you can
also
Linking Words
 go join different travelling groups.
Also
Linking Words
, you can manage your trip cost with
variety
Suggestion
a variety
 of modifications. Like you can go
for
Suggestion
to
 ride share as well as accommodation sharing to make your trip more economical.
Secondly
Linking Words
, reason of increase in travelling is awareness. Thanks to
internet
Suggestion
the internet
 and globalization, now people are growing more aware about opportunities of studies, businesses or even holidays out of their territory. With multiple options available, as discussed in
above paragraph
Suggestion
the above paragraph
, they can manage to avail them. These
days’
Suggestion
days
 lots of students travelling to other countries to acquire degrees in
subject
Suggestion
a subject
subjects
the subject
 which do not offered by their local universities and colleges.
Also
Linking Words
, business men and women travelling different regions to make
business deal
Suggestion
a business deal
 where they get
best quotes
Suggestion
the best quotes
 and quality.
In addition
Linking Words
, it is
also
Linking Words
 seen that now people are more interested in spending their holiday out of their cities and countries as there are range of comprehensive
traveling
the act of going from one place to another
travelling
 packages offering great deal of economy and adventure. Now coming toward benefits. I believe travelling broadens exposure. You explore new places and experience different
culture
Use synonyms
 and customs. You can make
most
Suggestion
the most
 of it in your community by adopting their best practices.
For
Linking Words
example if
Accept comma addition
example, if
 you visit Japan and experience their work
culture
Use synonyms
 and replicate it in your workplace. You can make your working more efficient. Same is the case with businesses. If you
travel
Use synonyms
 other country and witness better way of production you can imitate them in your country and make your operations equally efficient.
In
Linking Words
addition you
Accept comma addition
addition, you
 can make
difference
Suggestion
a difference
the difference
 in other communities by sharing and utilizing your knowledge and experience.
For
Linking Words
instance these
Accept comma addition
instance, these
days’
Suggestion
days
 lots of professionals
travel
Use synonyms
 to less privileged areas to provide education, health services and so on In the end,
besides
Linking Words
 relaxing travelling is a great way of leveraging learning and business opportunities out of your territories. Exploring new places and
culture
Use synonyms
 helps in broadening your
exposure which
Accept comma addition
exposure, which
give
Suggestion
gives
 more ideas for personal, professional and community improvements. By travelling you get a chance to share your
culture
Use synonyms
 and customs with other societies and you can make
difference
Suggestion
a difference
 there as well by sharing your knowledge and exposure. I believe
this
Linking Words
 surge in travelling trend is quite healthy and should be promoted.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: