IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

the pie charts below show the most common advantages and disadvantages of fairmont island, according to a servey of visitors.

the pie charts below show the most common advantages and disadvantages of fairmont island, according to a servey of visitors.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
According to
Linking Words
 a survey of travellers, the pie charts display the most important advantages and drawbacks of Firmont Island.
Overall
Linking Words
, the bulk of tourists felt really comfortable with the residents. In comparison, the main drawbacks to visiting Fairmont isle are the high cost of
life
Replace the word
living
show examples
. A higher percentage of the island's benefits went to its inhabitants, at 40 per cent. The landscape aspect
also
Linking Words
 kept pace with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
37 per cent. The culture and accommodation prices were more stable, which shows that tourists enjoy these aspects of the area equally. As reported, the most off-putting aspect for tourists was the cost of housing , cited by 45
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of survey respondents. Followed by a
third
Linking Words
 of the participants said that the Island has an entertainment problem. The
last
Linking Words
 two shortcomings were climate and dishes listed respectively by 20
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 and 5
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of respondents.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: