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Band 7

In many countries the level of crime is increasing and crimes are becoming more violent. Why do you think this is and what can be done about it?

#countries #level #crime #crimes
In the past decades, both western and eastern societies have been witnessing that an increasing rate of criminal conducts accompanying with upgraded violent level.
This
 essay will identify several root reasons for
this
 phenomenon and
then
 put forward some plausible solutions.
To begin
 with, soaring numbers of crimes and the seriousness of violent may be stem from two obvious reasons.
Firstly
, there is ample evidence that numerous scenes, including the element of horror, blood, and killing have stimulated audience from TV to theatre, some of whom are young adults, easily influenced residents and underage children in some cases. The power of the screen could possibly form a person’s value towards the world and his personal behaviour.
For example
, An extensive study by Washington University showed that 40% of criminal aged from 18-25 agree that committing something unlawful makes them feel cool like a character in a movie they ever seen.
Moreover
, as social media has prevailed recent years, all the rich and famous showcasing their privileged life have strengthened the gap of different social status, which attributes the bottom class of the society to resent disparity of society. When they encounter financial struggles, it might be easier for them to hurt innocent people more to revenge and release their fury.
Furthermore
, according to the above two reasons, it is undeniable that we should take actions to mitigate
this
 dangerous problem. Primarily, for government and local councils, raising citizen’s awareness to develop and build a healthy mental health should be realized through different campaigns and educational program in communities.
Secondly
, in a country like Canada, the death penalty should be strongly and frequently debated and discussed by the legal department, police force, and public in order to introduce into a new civil law. At the same time, the discussion could serve as a deterrent for potential law violators and juvenile offenders in the future. In conclusion, upgrading crime level and numbers could be attributed to TV and movie negative implication and social media exposure of the huge gap of society disparity, whereas we could hold more campaign and introduce the death penalty to solve
this
 problem gradually.
Submitted by caroline.long.ca on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • crime rate
  • violent crimes
  • socioeconomic factors
  • law enforcement
  • technology
  • education
  • employment
  • drug abuse
  • alcohol abuse
  • poverty
  • inequality
  • effectiveness
  • investing
  • job creation
  • social support
  • community engagement
What to do next:
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