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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think that children should start at a very early age. But others believe that should not go to school until they are older. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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There is an ongoing debate about the appropriate age for
children
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 to start
school
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.
While
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 some believe that early
education
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 is crucial, others argue that young
children
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 should be allowed more time to grow and play before entering the academic system.
This
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 essay will explore both perspectives before sharing a personal opinion. On one hand, enrolling
children
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 in
school
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 at an early age can greatly benefit their mental development. Early
education
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 helps sharpen memory, enhance creativity, and improve cognitive skills. A recent study compared two groups of
children
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 and found that those who started
school
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 earlier performed nearly 20% better in areas like memory retention, learning speed, and problem-solving. These findings suggest that early academic exposure lays a strong foundation for future success.
Therefore
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, early
education
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 can be seen as an investment in a child's long-term potential.
On the other hand
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, some people argue that young
children
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 should spend their early years playing and developing social and physical skills. They believe that structured
education
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 can place unnecessary pressure on
children
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 who are not yet emotionally or mentally ready. Activities like playing with a ball or interacting with peers help
children
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 develop coordination, communication, and emotional intelligence.
Moreover
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, many parents feel reluctant to separate from their
children
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 at a young age, fearing that
school
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 may disrupt their natural development. In my opinion,
while
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 emotional concerns are valid, delaying
education
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 may not be beneficial in the long run. Overprotection can hinder a child's growth and independence.
Therefore
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, I believe that
children
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 should begin
school
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 as early as possible, provided that the learning environment is supportive and age-appropriate. In conclusion, scientific research supports the benefits of early
education
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, and we should base our decisions on evidence rather than emotions. Helping
children
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 start their learning journey early gives them a valuable head start in life.

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coherence and cohesion
Your introduction provides a clear overview of the topic and outlines your essay effectively. However, consider rephrasing for greater clarity.
task achievement
The transition between paragraphs is strong, but ensuring that each perspective is equally explored could enhance balance.
task achievement
The examples provided are relevant, but including a counterexample could strengthen your argument and showcase deeper critical thinking.
task achievement
Your essay demonstrates a high level of understanding of both views, which reflects analytical skills.
coherence and cohesion
You have used a variety of vocabulary and complex sentences, which contribute to a fluent writing style.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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