Compared to the past more younger adults take medication for degenerative disease. Provide specific examples and reasons to support your answer.

It is certainly true that due to the advancement in the
technology humans
Accept comma addition
technology, humans
invented many drugs which not only helps to cure the
disease but
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disease, but
also
increase the
life
span, perhaps
this
is because many people argue that these days medicines helps to cure the generative
disease
as compared to the past. Degenerative
disease
are caused
Suggestion
is caused
by virus, genetic
disease
or
disease
caused by changes in
life style
a manner of living that reflects the person's values and attitudes
lifestyle
. In the subsequent paragraphs I will
analyze
consider in detail and subject to an analysis in order to discover essential features or meaning
analyse
why medication of degenerative
disease
among youngsters is increased.
First
of all, in the previous time the people were very healthy as well as had active lifestyle. These major degenerative diseases are diagnosed as lifestyle
disease
.
Furthermore consumption
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Furthermore, consumption
of fast food as well as drugs makes the situation worse.
For
example nowadays
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example, nowadays
consumption of cigarette among youngsters causes cancer. Older generation used to plough, digging the land with the help of machines. These physical work
make
Suggestion
makes
them fit.
However
modern generation
Suggestion
the modern generation
a modern generation
wants to lead
luxurious
Suggestion
a luxurious life
life
, where they are over
dependant
Suggestion
dependent
on machine and lead sedentary
life
.
For example
in the contemporary era everyone wants
white collar job
Suggestion
a white collar job
with less physical efforts due to
this
they become cough potatoes. On the other side, due to the modern technology and science nowadays various equipment and medication is available which add more years in the age of
person
Suggestion
the person
a person
, whereas in the past these resources were very limited, due to
this
lot of people died during the pandemic.
For
example in
Accept comma addition
example, in
previous
time many
Accept comma addition
time, many
people were
died
Suggestion
dying
due to cholera and
Tuberculoses
infection transmitted by inhalation or ingestion of tubercle bacilli and manifested in fever and small lesions (usually in the lungs but in various other parts of the body in acute stages)
tuberculosis
because very limited hospitals were available and people relied on conventional medicines as well as people were very superstitious. To conclude the availability of modern treatment of
disease
increase the lifespan and helps to diagnose
disease
more quickly.
Nonetheless
, in the previous time people lead
healthy
Suggestion
healthy lives
a healthy life
life
with plenty of exercise and died or fell ill during pandemic.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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