IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Some people think that new technology always improves the lives of workers. Other people believe that it results in disadvantages for workers. Discuss both opinion and give your own opinion.

#people #technology #lives #workers #results
Most people believe that
technology
 has enhanced the lives of employees whereas other people believe that it's more harmful than useful.In
this
 essay, I will put lights on both beneficial and detrimental viewpoints of advanced machinery which impacts on the lifestyle of the workers.
On the other hand
, technological advancement has brought dramatic changes in the style of working and promotes the quality of life of the working class. Automation has assisted to improve the quality of products in less time and without it and hard work.
For example
, after the industrial revolution, the improvisation in machinery brings money in the pockets of workers and the wealthy lifestyle of the labour class.
Moreover
, the biggest relief to the industrial sector is safety of an individual's work in hazardous places and development of medical
technology which
Accept comma addition
technology, which
 leads to decrease in fatal injuries working in heavy industries.
On the other hand
, where there is a rapid growth in machines would
also
 give setback to traditional or handmade industry.
Consequently
, most workers related to
this
 industry may lose their livelihood. Examples could be seen, when Britishers introduced machines in the cotton industry, almost cotton weavers or handicrafts lost their traditional business in cotton clothes.
Furthermore
, machinery has
also
 given people easy access to most things.
As a result
, people are more prone to health ailments and an unhealthy lifestyle.For illustration, most multinational company's employees have been sitting jobs on computers all day, which give eyesight problems as well as body posture dysfunction. Overall, it seems advisable that
technology
 should be used in a reasonable manner where it can be used in a sustainable way not in an excessive way which may be harmful to the environment.
Finally
, where
technology
 is a boon is
also
 a curse for mankind.
Submitted by sewakpetlain13 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: