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Writing Samples
Band 4

The chart shows the of cars manafacture's total sales in North America, Asia, South America and Europe

The chart shows the of cars manafacture's total sales in North America, Asia, South America and Europe
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The figure provided reveals the data about the
proportion
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 of cars sold in four different regions, over
the
Correct article usage
apply
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five consecutive years, starting from 2006.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen from the bar chart that the
proportion
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 of cars sold increased significantly in Asia,
while
Linking Words
 the opposite was true in South
America
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 and Europe.
Additionally
Linking Words
, the percentage of North
America
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 remained stable over the given
period
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. It's clear from the figure that the
proportion
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 of sales in Asia rose significantly over the given
period
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, and by 2010,
it's
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its
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 percentage
has
Wrong verb form
had
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 doubled and shows 50%.
By contrast
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, the percentages of sales in Europe and South
America
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 declined during the given
period
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, showing 35% and 29% in 2006, their
proportion
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 had dropped considerably to 30% and 9% respectively. With regards to North
America
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,
it's
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its
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 percentage remained steady at 11% during the
period
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.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words proportion, america, period with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 2 times.
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