IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Research shows business meetings and business trainings are done online. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages

#research #business #meetings #trainings
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It is true that business meetings and trainings are happening via
internet
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 in today's cutting-edge period albeit it has some drawbacks. Personally, I strongly believe that
offline
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 meetings and trainings are more beneficial for individuals due to online gatherings and educations could impact for people's health.
This
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 essay will analyse
benefits
Suggestion
the benefits
 and drawbacks of conferences and courses which are being on the
internet
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. To start with, there are a number of conveniences when individuals have business meetings and studies through the
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internet especially
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internet, especially
 a basic benefit is that it does not take time and you can participate
to
Suggestion
in
 meetings and courses even you are
at
Suggestion
in
 the home especially online connecting is more useful for people because
of it might save
Suggestion
it might save
 their money consuming.
For example
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, if people cannot connect with each other by the
internet
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 they will be forced to
offline
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communication
Accept comma addition
communication, then
then
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 it might cause some expenses
such
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 as fare for
taxi
Suggestion
a taxi
taxis
, a consuming something and other needs.
Secondly
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,
Accept space
,
online courses and meetings could give remarkably develop because individuals can contact with each other from everywhere in the world. If companies want to contact with foreign
companies whereas
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companies, whereas
 face-to-face communication might cause a number of expenses
such
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 as air tickets
,
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,
living in foreign country includes taxi fare, payment for a hotel and food products whereas online connecting is
more accurate way
Suggestion
a more accurate way
.
By contrast
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, opponents of
this
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 view point out that meetings which are happening through the
internet
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 has several drawbacks for
individuals
Suggestion
individual
 health due to cutting-edge technologies might cause various diseases
such
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 as obesity
,
Accept space
,
depression and eye-diseases. Another issue is that low quality of the
internet
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 in some areas and
this
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 can make some problems for
people
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people, therefore
therefore
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offline
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 meetings seem so useful for some individuals.
In addition
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, we cannot say that everybody has
a
Suggestion
an
 opportunity to connect
internet
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. Some people have not electronic equipments to connect network due to their
financially
Suggestion
financial
 way.
Furthemore
in addition
Furthermore
, normally people take online lessons or meetings they do not feel
strong responsibility
Suggestion
a strong responsibility
. It means that they might work without strong
initiative
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initiative, then
then
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 some declines might be observed in their work. In conclusion, nowadays online gatherings and lessons are becoming more up-to-date in only some modern countries because other countries have not a high speed of the
network
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network, hence
hence
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offline
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 courses are better still and they have got more benefits than
another
not the same one or ones already mentioned or implied
other
 communication type.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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