IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmers (for example working for a charity, improving the neighborhood or teaching sports to younger children). To what extent do you agree or disagree

#people #community #service #part #school #programmers #charity #neighborhood #sports #children
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Some
people
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 think that
volunteer
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work
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 which is useful to the community, should be mandatory
on
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for
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 teenagers who study at high school. I completely disagree with that opinion
due to
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 several reasons that I will discuss in greater detail in my essay. First of all,
although
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 nowadays it is not common
in
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for
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 teenagers joining to
volunteer
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work
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, it imposes
this
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work
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it
Correct your spelling
is
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 not the key way to solve
this
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 problem. In
other word
Change the wording
another word
other words
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,
teach
Wrong verb form
teaching
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students
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 advantages and how
much
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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important to help other
people
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,
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this
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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makes
students
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 like
volunteer
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work
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.
For instance
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, if
would teach
Wrong verb form
teaching
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students
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volunteer
Correct pronoun usage
that volunteer
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work
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 helps to improve
community
Add an article
the community
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, it will outcome we have a generation of teenagers
like
Correct pronoun usage
who like
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help
Fix the infinitive
to help
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people
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 and will stay
like
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to
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 help
people
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 after finishing school.
Instead
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 of generation compulsory to do, help
people
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 and In the future,
this
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 will lead to avoiding voluntary
work
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. One class in
week
Correct article usage
a week
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specified
Add a missing verb
is specified
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 for educating the student about
volunteer
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work
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 more useful
of
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than
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 mandatory.
Secondly
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, the high school Rehabilitation
students
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 to university, so their
students
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 do not have enough time for doing
volunteer
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work
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, especially for weaker
students
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, so
make
Wrong verb form
making
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volunteer
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work
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 compulsory
It
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apply
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will negatively affect
students
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.
For example
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, if the
students
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spent
Wrong verb form
spend
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 a lot of time
for
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apply
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volunteer
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work
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such
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 as working for charity, improving the neighbourhood and
clean
Replace the word
cleaning
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 roads,
then
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did
Wrong verb form
they do
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 not achieve to good degree
that’s
Verb problem
which
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 will lead to
avoid
Wrong verb form
avoiding
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students
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volunteer
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work
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. In conclusion, I think
encourage
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encouraging
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 the
students
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 to do
volunteer
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work
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 and
educate
Wrong verb form
educating
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him
Correct pronoun usage
them
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how
Change preposition
on how
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 is important, it will be more useful than
make
Change the verb form
making
show examples
volunteer
Use synonyms
work
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 compulsory.
Submitted by sltanking583 on

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