IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Write a letter to your local newspaper. In your letter:say in general what you like about shopping in your area, say what is wrong with the facilities, suggest how they can be improved

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I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to express my opinion on the decreasing eminence of
Greater
Correct article usage
the Greater
show examples
 Kailash M block market. Substantially, International shopping brands and stupendous restaurants make me visit the market frequently and
also
Linking Words
 popular among
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
international tourists. There are,
however
Linking Words
, in my
opinion
Add the comma(s)
,opinion
show examples
 has areas of improvements which I think should be put. Right.
Firstly
Linking Words
, limited parking space, due to the
increase
Replace the word
increasing
show examples
 number of vehicle parking space has become
amajor
Correct your spelling
a major
 challenge
especially
Add the comma(s)
,especially
show examples
 on weekend. Regrettably, the cleanliness and hygiene of public convenience have been disappointingly deleterious. As I am aware that your newspaper is widely read and if you run a poll you will get the real feedback.
Also
Linking Words
, I would like to share my suggestions for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
improvement,
such
Linking Words
 as the authorities should construct multilevel parking which will increase the vehicle parking capacity.
Finally
Linking Words
,
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 number of public convenience staff should be increased to maintain hygiene & cleanliness along with shift roster and should be strictly supervised. I will appreciate
if
Correct pronoun usage
it if
show examples
 you publish an editorial and refining
shopping
Correct article usage
the shopping
show examples
 experience. I look forward to hearing from you. Yours Faithfully, Bhavna Malik

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The Greeting

Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.

Always start an informal letter in the ways:

  • Dear + name
  • Hi / Hello + name

‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.

For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:

  • Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
  • Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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