Using a computer every day can have more negative than positive effects on your children. Do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Computer

Use synonyms

is one of the most important part of our modern society. While some people prefer their children don'

Use synonyms

work with

Use synonyms

computer

Suggestion

computers

the computer

every day, others find some benefits in daily working

Suggestion

with

computer

Use synonyms

. I agree with the

first

Linking Words

view. So, I am going to explain my opinion.

First

Linking Words

of all, working with

computer

Use synonyms

for

long

Suggestion

a long time

time

Use synonyms

during a day

can makes

Suggestion

can make

a bad effect on eyes of children.

look

perceive with attention; direct one's gaze towards

Look

at the screen of the

computer

Use synonyms

has a lot of

sid

a place within a region identified relative to a center or reference location

side

Sid

effect

Suggestion

effects

for children's eyes. If we didn'

Use synonyms

attention on that, it has a bad effect on their health.

In addition

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

is on parents’ duty to care about children.

For example

Linking Words

, my friend’s child, played with

Use synonyms

computer

Suggestion

computers

the computer

every day for

long

Suggestion

a long time

time

Use synonyms

. His parents didn'

Use synonyms

care that one.

Finally

Linking Words

, after couples of years they understood their son needs to the wear the glasses. It was deep trouble for

boys

Suggestion

the boys

who was 7 years.

Second

Linking Words

, children by working on

Use synonyms

computer

Suggestion

the computer

computers

a computer

, loos the exercise

time

Use synonyms

Therefore

Linking Words

, they can'

Use synonyms

do move more and start to fat. Children when play or work with PC, enjoy eating during that.

Consequently

Linking Words

, be fat is

make

Suggestion

making

the huge problem for them in future.

For instance

Linking Words

, my brother had

got

Suggestion

gotten

this

Linking Words

problem.

until

Suggestion

Until

now that he is 20 years, he couldn'

Use synonyms

lose his weigh. According, I think in child

age we

Accept comma addition

age, we

should focus on some reasons which help to going fat and stop them. In conclusion, I would like to restate my opinion about don'

Use synonyms

daily work with

Suggestion

a PC

. Due to heath

body

Accept comma addition

body, such

such

Linking Words

as effecting on the eyes and losing the exercise’s

time

Use synonyms

and start

Suggestion

with

fat, I believe that

Use synonyms

computer

Suggestion

the computer

a computer

is a significant factor here.

aidam8630Sun Apr 26 2020

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

279 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

Screen time
Sedentary lifestyle
Physical inactivity
Cognitive development
Internet addiction
Cyberbullying
Inappropriate content
Digital literacy
Virtual learning environments
Parental controls
Moderation
Online safety
Tech-savvy
E-learning
Information technology
Eye strain
Social skills
Multitasking
Interactive education
Health repercussions

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
The percentage of overweight children in westrn society has increased by almost 20% in the last ten years.
In the last ten years, the proportion of children with excessive weight has become one of the most concerning issues in Western society and increased by about 20%. The reason behind this problem is unhealthy food and a sedentary lifestyle. As a result, there are several side effects of being overweight, such as physical and mental health problems.
6.5
band
2.Deforestation caused by human activity is happening in many parts of the world, with serious results for the enviroment. What do you think can be done to solve this problem?
Deforestation caused by human activity is happening in many parts of the world, with serious results for the environment. Personally, I think that the government can be done to solve this problem in some ways that I shall explain in more detail in this essay.
6.5
band
Research indicates that the characteristics we are born with have much more influence on our personality and development than any experiences we may have in our life. Which do you consider to be the major influence?
In recent decades, the factor that shapes our personality has seen divergent opinions. With numerous studies influencing the debate, the question of whether nature has a greater impact than nurture on our characteristics has become a matter of discussion. Even though both nature and nurture play pivotal roles, from my perspective, I firmly believe that the attributes we are born with exert a more substantial influence on our overall development.
6
band
Today our communications, medicine and transport systems all depend on computer technology. Our reliance on computer technology in these fields has created a dangerous situation. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.
The developments we have achieved during the last century caused a rapid change in our behaviour and habits. From communication to transportation, everything has changed, so that our tasks are less demanding and repetitive. Even though our life has become easier, it might change in the forseeable future. Despite the disadvantages, I am inclined to believe that as far as we dominate over this technology, the will not be detrimental.
6.5
band
Mrs Barrett, an English-speaking woman who lives in your town, has advertised for someone to help her in her home for a few hours a day next summer. Write a letter to Mrs Barrett. In your letter: • suggest how you could help her in her home • say why you would like to do this work • explain when you will and will not be available Begin your letter as follows: Dear …………….,
I hope this letter finds you in good health. My name is John Monta, and I am writing in response to your advertisement seeking a house helper in The City Times Newspaper. I want to express my keen interest in this opportunity.

Using a computer every day can have more negative than positive effects on your children. Do you agree or disagree?

The percentage of overweight children in westrn society has increased by almost 20% in the last ten years.

2.Deforestation caused by human activity is happening in many parts of the world, with serious results for the enviroment. What do you think can be done to solve this problem?

Research indicates that the characteristics we are born with have much more influence on our personality and development than any experiences we may have in our life. Which do you consider to be the major influence?