Central and local government make a frantic attempt to promote festivals to create a lot of revenue. Some people think this money should be invested in social programs for the poor.

Nowadays, we live in an age of modern society.
As a result
, central and local
government
try
Suggestion
tries
to promote festival so as to increase revenue.
However
, some people believe that it is necessary to invest money in social programs for the poor. I agree that money used for social program
need
Suggestion
needs
to be prioritized.
On the other hand
, it is undeniable that investing festival will bring a great deal of advantages. The revenue which comes from promoting festivals may become the crucial elements to deal with financial disorder.
Moreover
, it should be highlighted that improving tourists can lead to enhancing reputations for
local area
Suggestion
the local area
local areas
. If local
government
make
Suggestion
makes
a frantic attempt to promote festivals, local cities will become one of the best
destination
Suggestion
destinations
for tourists.
However
, I believe that there are
number
Suggestion
a number
of advantages to investing money in social programs
instead
of festivals.
First
of all, the demand of the poor is more pressing than others. Some
researches
a scientist who devotes himself to doing research
researchers
point out that the number of unemployment is increasing annual
year
Suggestion
yearly
.
Moreover
, unemployed people have a tendency to become
the poor
Suggestion
poorer
. Because the rate of jobless people will have a lot of negative effects on society,
government
need
Suggestion
needs
to
back up
an accumulation caused by clogging or a stoppage
backup
them. Another point is that promoting social programs play a vital role in decreasing social issues. A reason for
that is
that if central and local
government
subsidize the amount of
budget
Suggestion
the budget
which are provided for medicine and charity, the life quality of citizen will be improved. As a
consequences
Suggestion
consequence
, people do not have worry about their life and the number of
crime
Suggestion
crimes
will be decreased. To sum up,
although
promoting festivals have a lot of positive influences on creating revenue.
central
Suggestion
Central
and local
government
should focus on investing in social programs for the poor.

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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