IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Write a letter to your friend who you recently travelled with to a foreign country. Include • Why you enjoyed the trip • What you are doing now • An invitation to visit you now

Dear Tom, How are you? I hope
this
Linking Words
 letter finds you well. I am writing to thank you and to invite you to my place. A trip to Thailand was full of fun and memorable. I will never forget the moments we have spent together after a long
Check wording
time; It
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;
Punctuation problem
.
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 It was like the old days. Water games
such
Linking Words
 as scuba diving; surfing
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
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 the most enjoyable
moment
Fix the agreement mistake
moments
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. Hospitality was great, and
seafood
Correct article usage
the seafood
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 was awesome. I cherished every single day of my holidays. Now, I
got
Verb problem
have
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 an opportunity to change my job
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 it’s a multi-national company
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 I have to move to Pune for training
up
Change preposition
for up
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 to 6 months. I have a got a good chance to explore
south
Fix capitalization
South
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 India, culture, and I’ll grab it with
my
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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both hands. It would be a great pleasure to invite you to Pune for my birthday in September. We will go to the nearby tourist places and have great fun there. I am expecting you to be with me at that time. Please try to make it. Warm wishes, Vishal.

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task response
The letter covers all asked parts: the trip, your current work, and the invite. Some parts show good detail, but fix grammar to be clear.
coherence and cohesion
Break into 3 short paragraphs. Put one main idea in each. Start with the trip, then what you do now, then the invite.
grammar
Use simple and correct grammar. For example, 'The trip to Thailand was full of fun and many happy memories.' Also fix punctuation.
content
Good detail about what you did on the trip.
tone
Warm tone and clear invite at the end.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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