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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think it s good for teenagers to have part time jobs, while other people believe teenagers should not work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #teenagers #part #time #jobs #work
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Working from an early
age
 has been a debatable subject over the
time
. While some people consider that young people should start working as soon as possible, others think the opposite.
This
 essay will discuss both views and will share the author’s personal opinion about it.
To begin
 with, teenagers having part-
time
 jobs have been a common practice since ancient times. These jobs usually are for a shorter period of
time
 than regular, suitable to youngster’s possibilities and have a significant role in their development.
Moreover
, the sense of reward for their
work
 gives them self confidence and motivation to learn and improve their skills.
For example
, if a teenager starts working in a company during his studies, he will be motivated to learn more in order to be promoted in that company and to be better paid for his
work
. So, working from an early
age
 could have many benefits for young people.
On the other hand
, some people consider that teenagers should not
work
 at all. It could be said that at an early
age
 people should focus on
education
 rather on
wo
rk.
Suggestion
the work
In addition
, there are many situations when the
work
 becomes an abuse and children cannot protect themselves against their rulers.
For example
, in the poor countries, children are doing a lot of physical
work
 that overweigh their capabilities and, at the same
time
, they have no
time
 for
education
.
Therefore
, children should not
work
, but focus on their
education
 and their growth. In conclusion, working from an early
age
 is a questionable subject with different perspectives. While some people encourage part-
time
work
 as a tool for young’s people development, others are against it, thinking about the drawbacks like abusing, lacking of
time
 for
education
 and so on. In my opinion,
education
 should be the
first
 priority at
this
age
, but some part-
time
 jobs, during holidays, could be extremely helpful for young people. These temporary jobs could give them a sense of reality and make them realize what and why is important to study at school.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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