Nowadays, most countries improve the standard of living through economic development. But some social values are lost as a result. Do you think the advantages of the phenomenon outweigh the disadvantages?

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World economic development has rescued many

people

Use synonyms

out of

Change preposition

from

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deprivation and brought a better life,

whereas

Linking Words

most

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apply

show examples

people

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claim

this

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trend leads to the loss of traditional

values

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. In my opinion,

this

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trend has more advantages and disadvantages which are manageable to cope with. On the one hand, many benefits are brought because of economic growth.

Firstly

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, it reduces impoverishment and improves the quality of life.

While

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economy

Correct article usage

the economy

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grows, more job opportunities are being created. The income from jobs can help

the

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apply

show examples

society escape poverty and

people

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can have a better standard of living.

In addition

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people

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can have access to education when they can afford the tuition fee. Through education,

people

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gain a variety of knowledge in many fields

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and learn how to use it for a better world.

For example

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, Singapore used to be one of the world's poorest islands has become one of the richest countries.

Government

Correct article usage

The government

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attracts foreign investors with no taxes,

invests

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and invests

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20% of its GDP in education. Citizens of Singapore study at

most

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the most

show examples

prestigious universities around the for free.

On the other hand

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, there is no denying the fact that some traditional

values

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are perishing because of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

consumerism.

For example

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, after meeting basic needs,

people

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are eager to pursue more luxurious items without cherishing the things they have already owned. Humans think that everything can be bought with money, even friendship and love. When

the

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apply

show examples

humanity becomes like

this

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, it is hard for us to trust others or build a true relationship.

However

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the

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apply

show examples

social

values

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can be restored by imparting moral lessons from an early age.

People

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can cultivate the correct moral

values

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and stick to those principles, even though

the

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apply

show examples

society may be changing.

For example

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, China and Japan keep their traditional culture alive by celebrating the Lunar Year and

Respect

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respecting

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for aged day. Celebrating holidays together helps to nurture

the

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apply

show examples

family connections, giving a sense of belonging and

celebrate

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celebrating

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generations of families. More importantly, traditions create positive memories for children.

To conclude

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the

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apply

show examples

society should develop the economy because it brings immense benefits,

such

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as improved quality of life and chance to acquire learning. As for the risk of losing social

values

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, it can be prevented by giving

value

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valuable

show examples

schooling from an early age.

bammesdilia24Sun Apr 26 2020

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coherence cohesion

Provide a clear thesis statement in the introduction to state your position on the topic. This will help guide the rest of your essay.

task achievement

Develop your main points further by providing more specific examples and explanations. This will make your argument stronger.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and restates your position. This will give your essay a strong ending.

grammatical range accuracy

Consider using more varied sentence structures and vocabulary to demonstrate a wider range of grammatical and lexical resources.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

375 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

standard of living
economic development
social values
materialism
community welfare
sustainable technologies
environmental degradation
social stratification
social cohesion
economic status

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Nowadays, most countries improve the standard of living through economic development. But some social values are lost as a result. Do you think the advantages of the phenomenon outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that zoos are cruel and should be closed down. Others, however, believe that zoos can be useful in protecting wild animals. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

More and more adults are playing computer games. why si this happening? is it a positive or negative trend?

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The continued rise in the world's population is the greatest problem faced by humanity at the present time. What are the causes of this continued rise? Do you agree that it is the greatest problem faced by humanity?

Car ownership has increased so rapidly over the past thirty years that many cities in the world are now one big traffic jam. How true do you think this statement is? What measures can governments take to discourage people from using cars?