IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3

Social media is becoming increasingly popular amongst all age groups. However, sharing personal information on social media websites does have risks. Do you think that the advantages of social media outweigh the disadvantages?

#media #age #groups #information #websites #risks
Social media platforms are a kind of
platform
 where people can connect on
large scale
Suggestion
a large scale
 via Instagram, Facebook,
Twitter etc
Accept comma addition
Twitter, etc
, where the people of all age groups can participate at the same and share their view, emotion, happiness
etc
studies intended to provide general knowledge and intellectual skills (rather than occupational or professional skills)
arts
 with the world population. Nowadays,
this
 digital media
is playing
Suggestion
are playing
 very important roles in world developments from different parts of the countries. It creates awareness in public through socially, politically, technologically, climate changes, economically, etc.
However
, Each and every generation is welcoming to these
digitalize
a powerful cardiac stimulant obtained from foxglove
digitalis
digitalise
 online media because
from
Suggestion
of
 the
last
 two decades, the people are less active and less known about their well-being of their relatives and friends compared to the current situation. Social media is a perfect
platform
 for business awareness, personal interaction, social cause, brand promotion, make a brand, and advertising. It’s less investment to promote or create product information.
For example
, youth using
this
platform
 to promote their personalize information, talent, production launch, etc. But
on the contrary
, people are often using
this
platform
 for
wrong purpose
Suggestion
the wrong purpose
 of personal use. They
utilizing
Suggestion
are utilizing
utilize
are utilized
 the
platform
 for cheap promotion and do the fraud or jeopardy. In my point of view, I feel social media is a great
platform
 for all
generation
Suggestion
generations
 to get connected with the world sitting at home and make
connection
Suggestion
connections
a connection
the connection
 and promote their self via
this
 technology.
Submitted by dixitvivek884 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: