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Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Governments give a lot of support to artists, even though some people think it is a waste of money that could have been used elsewhere. Discuss both view and give your opinion

#governments #support #artists #people #waste #money
Some people think that it is right to allocate a huge amount of funds to artists, whereas others assert that
this
 can be diverted to other important sector like
health
. I believe that
although
 artists need financial assistance to grow their career, giving funds to nations’
health
 issues is a better option. On the one hand, young painters and sculptors need grants and loans from the state because they are not established enough to support themselves.
That is
 to say that at the beginning of their occupation, no one knows who they are and they are
therefore
 unable to sell any of their works and
therefore
 need monetary support.
For example
, Damien Hirst was given a grant to attend Art College when he was a young man and without
this
 he might have had to take a normal job.
However
, I believe that normal people do not benefit from works of art as much as they do from spending money on healthcare.
On the other hand
, there are those that believe that governments squander their money when they give it to artists. They think that there are so many other departments,
such
 as education, infrastructure and
health
 that need attention and are
underfunded
.
For example
, in every country in the world, there are still incurable diseases,
such
 as diabetes, and the whole country would benefit if there was more attention given to finding a cure. I believe
health
 is much more worthy of state spending because it saves lives, whereas art is quite useless in
this
 regard. In conclusion,
although
 helping those working in the arts might subsidise the production of masterpieces, a painting cannot help the sick and dying and it is
therefore
 better if funding
health
 is given priority.
Submitted by shahobov1995 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • promote
  • culture
  • creativity
  • economic growth
  • tourism
  • social development
  • personal development
  • merit
  • financial support
  • balanced
  • transparent
What to do next:
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