Some people believe that to give opportunities to the new generation companies should encourage high level employees who are older than 55 to retire. Do you agree or disagree

There is a general consensus amongst scholars that supporting the new generations for having a job is bearing a great impact on societies. Some people argue that giving opportunities to young population should be considered by companies, while high level experienced employees can be persuaded to be retired.
However i
Accept comma addition
However, I
However I
contend that young and old people could be supported for work. The reasons are two fold. On the one hand, clearly, dedicating occupation for young individuals can revolutionize the country exponentially high. Undoubtedly, since low age staffs or workers are immensely educated, with updated knowledge, solving country problems can be with less difficulties.
Moreover
, they can enhance the community by innovative ideas due to having wide horizon.
This
is not only due to their brilliant know-how, but
also
having some academic skills.
Therefore
, if company allocate an appropriate vicinity in brilliant job positions for young adults, much benefit will come for employers.
Furthermore
, Not having essential expertises in lower ages seems to be a real pitfall for retiring old staffs. It is absolutely manifest that providing an incredible product require sufficient abilities at work. So it is a vital point to keep high ranked staffs to improve factory.
Thus
, getting rid of people who working in the upper ages (more than 55) may be mistaken. The existing data provide a concrete foundation to conclude that
although
having a job opportunity is vitally important specially for new generation, maintaining retired people is necessary as well.
Therefore
, both generations can work together.
Submitted by zfmphysicist on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: