IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

It is generally believed that education is of vital importance to individual development and the well-being of societies What should education consist of to fulfill both these functions

#education #importance #development #societies #functions
It is thought that individual development and the well-being of societies depends on education. There are some ways education should do to fulfil both these functions The one hand, it is clear that taking a gap year would bring about several advantages. One evident strength is that it would help teenagers relaxed after studying hard. During
this
 time, they can take up a sport they like or do something prohibited while studying for an exam.
Consequently
, they have not felt stress before going to the universities. Another reason is that young people can improve themselves. Because when they travel to other countries for a year, they can have a chance to gain the knowledge about new cultures, local people and pick up new languages.
Last
 but not least, one-year gap after high school can
also
 give them the time and experience to make tough decisions, like decide what they truly want to study or what career to pursue
Submitted by ngocmai.nguyenhn2005 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: