Nowadays, celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements, and this sets a bad example to young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

#celebrities #glamour #wealth #achievements #sets #people

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In present scenario, it is true that most of the celebrities are popular because of their luxurious lifestyle and looks.

However

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, talented people always struggle to welcome

Accept space

but

this

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sets a negative influence to teenager.

Although

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, I am satisfied with

this

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statement, I

also

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consider that some of them are

real role model

Suggestion

real role models

a real role model

to youth.

To begin

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with, a wealthy person might make

effort

Suggestion

an effort

the effort

efforts

to be in a limelight than any

accomplishable

Suggestion

individual.

First

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and foremost, juvenile tend to obtain everything with cost. To explain, young people often follow social account of well known persons since they want to inspire from their glamorous routine. Considering that the money is the only key to become famous. Teenager begin to show off and buy expensive items

instead

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off work on their skills.

Hence

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, at any cost, youth change their ways with

amount

Suggestion

a mount

For example

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, welcome actress Sara Ali Khan became

popular so

Accept comma addition

popular, so

easily because of her family background while most common girls struggle and give too

much

Suggestion

many

auditions to take a chance in

industry

Suggestion

the industry

Furthermore

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, there is no doubt that

favorable

encouraging or approving or pleasing

favourable

families'

children mostly

Suggestion

children, mostly

children most

children most most

get

first

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opportunity rather than commoners, whether they have abilities or not. Many folk juvenile spent their valuable period of career, but they failed to climb on the stairs of success even if they are complete pack of creativity. In the dreams of getting famous and will be shown

Suggestion

television, folks work hard, someone of them are lucky, but someone

are

Suggestion

unlucky.

On the contrary

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, some wealthy celebrities

are not only emphasize

Suggestion

are not only emphasizing

do not only emphasize

their way of

living but

Accept comma addition

living, but

also

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teach youth a wonderful lesson. To explicate, there are some exceptions popular persons, who really grappled and achieved his position at own ability. Whenever they are asked for their biography by an interviewer, they tell their struggling time and how they come in

industry

Suggestion

the industry

For instance

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, Akshay

kumar

Suggestion

Kumar

, who was an assistant cook in Chandni Chowk (Delhi),

also

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had worked as a bus conductor, but with his own

deligence

conscientiousness in paying proper attention to a task; giving the degree of care required in a given situation

diligence

, he snatched his designation

Accept space

To conclude, to become eminent, there should only count skills, passion, and hard work

instead

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of good lifestyle, bank balance and strong family background. Celebrities should be an idol for society, how they achieved their goals.

Thu Apr 30 2020

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

372 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

glamour
wealth
achievements
portrayed
overshadow
influenced
lifestyles
unrealistic
expectations
values
promoting
hard work
perseverance
inspire
positive impact

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Nowadays, celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements, and this sets a bad example to young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The increasing demand for oil and gas has made it necessary to look for these sources of energy in remote and untouched natural places. Do you think the advantages of locating oil and gas in these places outweigh the disadvantages of damaging these places?

Nowadays museums and historical sites are mainly visited by foreign tourists instead of locals. Why is this happening? What can be done to get locals to visit museums and historical sites more?

discuss whether the advantages of nuclear energy outweigh the potentia risk and environment concern