Violence in media promotes violence in society. To what extend u agree.

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Introduction

In today's modern world, the number of people using media is rising

dramatically but

Accept comma addition

dramatically, but

only small of them are using online communication in the right way. People tend to act badly in

media

Suggestion

the media

and there is no doubt that

violence

Use synonyms

in the real life is affected by online activities.

This

Linking Words

essay will explain

this

Linking Words

idea

for

Suggestion

more detail.

Body paragraph 1

First

Linking Words

violence

Use synonyms

media

Suggestion

the media

spreading

speedly

with rapid movements

speedily

makes more people reach wrong information and imitate immediately. A clip or post is viewed by million people within a few minutes

Suggestion

from

the technology development.

This

Linking Words

is why a post with the content of child abuse, domestic

violence

Use synonyms

or fighting can be spread widely and in the limelight. Take scandals of celebrities as

example

Suggestion

an example

, they are those who

are often taken

Suggestion

are often taking

often take

photos by

papararies

Suggestion

and

criticed

an essay or article that gives a critical evaluation (as of a book or play)

critique

in social media even when they are out of shape or have

bankrupts

Suggestion

bankrupted

. The fan prying into their life could impact them significantly.

Body paragraph 2

Then

Linking Words

, releasing the films having

violence

Use synonyms

has

adverse influence

Suggestion

an adverse influence

in viewers. Many producers imply that criminal commitment or cybercrime should be

avoided but

Accept comma addition

avoided, but

generally they make people mimic. Many

Use synonyms

violence

Suggestion

violent

actions in comic films or action movies in the real life are captured by youngsters. According to updated news, a large number of students after watching action movies having strong battles and magnifying content have conflict with classmates more frequently.

Conclusion

In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

media

Suggestion

the media

is an efficient site to broaden our horizon, we should know how to prevent ourselves from

violence

Use synonyms

content as well as

another

not the same one or ones already mentioned or implied

other

controversial aspects.

chaule2k

May 1, 2020

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

5.0

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

252 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Desensitization
Aggressive behavior
Imitation
Media regulation
Cultural context
Exposure
Social influence
Violent imagery
Psychological impact
Norms and values
Media consumption
Sensationalism

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Violence in media promotes violence in society. To what extend u agree.

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

The best way to ensure a happy family life for children is to make mothers and fathers take part in parenting courses every year.Do you agree or disagree with this idea?

The growth of online shopping will one day lead to all shops in towns and cities closing . Do you agree or disagree ?

Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example working for a charity, improving the neighborhood or teaching sprots to younger children). To what extent do you agree or disagree?