IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

The diagram below show how glass containers, such as bottles, are produced and recycled.

#show #glass #containers #bottles
The diagram describes a process of how to manufacture and recycle the
glass
 containers.
Overall
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
glass
 production has 4 steps to make raw materials into the product, which is the
glass
 container.
While
 the other,
glass
 recycling,
need
Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
show examples
 5 steps to convert used
glass
 into new products. At
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
glass
 production, the process starts with 3 main raw materials: sand, soda ash, and limestone. These materials will be mixed
together with
 some chemicals to become a perfect mixture.
This
 mixture will be melted in a
glass
 furnace at approximately 1500•c. The next one is
shaping
Correct article usage
the shaping
show examples
 step, when molten
glass
 is blown into a permanent shape. Let the model cool down and the
glass
 container is completed.
On the other hand
,
glass
 recycling starts the process with the used
glass
. These items were collected and sorted by
color
Change the spelling
colour
show examples
. The sorted
glass
 was washed carefully in order to remove impurities like dust or dirt. After that, non-impurities
glass
 is crushed and melted.
The next step is
 quite similar to the shaping step in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
glass
 production
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 when molten
glass
 is blown and
molded
Change the spelling
moulded
show examples
 into
new
Add an article
a new
the new
show examples
 product.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
▼
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
▼
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words glass with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: