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Band 6

These days, mobile phones and the internet are very important to the ways in which people relate to one another socially. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

#phones #internet #people #development
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The invention of communication mediums,
such
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 as cell phones and the
internet
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, has been profound achievements in today's
world
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.
This
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 essay will outline the perspective, merits the big one is
narrowed
Suggestion
narrowing
 down the distances, and another one is entertainment through video games, which is stronger than its demerits.
To begin
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 with a positive perspective, friends and relatives, living a million miles far are one call away. Mobile phones are the fastest and reliable source to contact loved ones through audio or video calls.
Moreover
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, the phone is a blessing to quickly access,
help services
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help, services
such
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 as police, ambulance and firefighters in case of emergencies. Another exclusive feature is its camera, to capture valuable moments of life, anytime and anywhere. A recent survey conducted by the University of Virginia reported, 78% of the people in the
world
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 prefer the mobile phone to stay connected and to socialize with their nears and dears. Apart from
this
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, the
internet
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 made the
world
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 a smaller place, from where people can play online video games individually or can make teams where members could belong to different countries while sitting in their comfort zones.
Furthermore
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, another benefit is, any childhood lost friend can be found and stay connected using applications, Facebook, Instagram and many more. In January 2020, around 2.6 billion users in the whole
world
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are connected
Suggestion
connect
 through only Facebook. Moving
further
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, the merits mentioned above should not blind us towards the danger the
internet
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 possesses as it is the double-edged weapon. There is always a risk of a hacker to intrude on someone's privacy and identity theft.
In addition
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 to
this
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, overuse of phones and the
internet
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 can cause health risks,
for example
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, poor eyesight, depression and anxiety. In conclusion, undoubtedly, the advantages of the newer ways of correspondence remove the distances
among
Suggestion
between
 many people.
However
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, everyone should be vigilant towards its disadvantages.
Submitted by salotrakamal12 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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