Some say that by showing sporting events such as Olympic and world cup in television will encourage old people to do exercise.

#say #events #olympic #world #cup #television #people #exercise

Physical

exercise

is vital in keeping our body healthy.

However

, over the past years it was observed that adults are not doing enough

exercise

. While some say that the best way to inspire them to

exercise

is by showing spectacular sporting events like the Olympic and world cup on

television

, I believe that there are better ways to encourage them

such

as improving

exercise

facilities and

support

from family members. There are people who believe that showing spectacular sporting events in the

television

such

as the Olympics and world cup will encourage older people to

exercise

. The basis of their argument lies in the fact that adults have the inherent tendency to follow their role models or idols. Sports celebrities

such

as boxers, tennis players, basketball stars have a great influence on their fans, and by showing them sports events on TV they follow the ways of sports stars.

As a result

, adults will engage in physical activities

such

exercise

For example

, in the Philippines, every time Manny Pacquiao has a boxing match, a month after his fight the attendance in boxing gym increases by 30 percent.

However

, showing sports events on

television

does not guarantee a perpetual engagement in

exercise

among adults. I believe that by improving

exercise

facilities like gyms and sports centre and family

support

could encourage them. When

such

facilities are in good condition they will be eager to try and they will not be afraid of accident that may cause by poor condition of

exercise

equipment.

Furthermore

, family members have huge influence among adults. By being with them during their

exercise

, they will be driven by the moral

support

and

thus

they will continue and even increase their activity.

For instance

, my father increased his jogging activity from once a week to twice a week since I joined him in his morning jogging routine. In conclusion,

although

showing spectacular sport events on

television

could inspire older people to

exercise

, I believe that by improving the

exercise

facilities and sports centre together with the family

support

, adults will engage more in

exercise

Submitted by noel_baltazar on Sat May 02 2020

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

347 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

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Some say that by showing sporting events such as Olympic and world cup in television will encourage old people to do exercise.

Include an introduction and conclusion

With all the troubles in the world today, money spent on space exploration is a complete waste. The money could be better spent on other things. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

some experts believe that it is better for children to begin leaning a foregin language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that sending criminals to prison is not effective. Education and job training should be used instead. Do you agree or disagree?

Many people say that we have developed into a “throw-away society”, because we are filling up our environment with so many plastic bags and rubbish that we cannot fully dispose of. To want degree do you agree with that opinion?