IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

You would like a temporary job working in a summer camp which runs sport and outdoor activities for children and young people next summer. Write a letter to the organisers of the summer camp. In your letter: •Explain what sort of job you would like to do. •Describe your personality. •Say what experience and skills you have.

#job #summer #camp #sport #activities #children #people #organisers #•explain #sort #•describe #personality #•say #skills
Dear Sir or Madam, I'm writing to you with reference to advertisements regarding the jobs, which you provided for people. I have noticed some of your proposals in a newspaper, so I would like to get a position in your camp as manager of sports events. It's my belief that I am the most suitable candidate for the position, which I have mentioned above
due to
 my personal qualities
such
 as responsibility, reliability and high level of self-organisation.
Moreover
, when it comes to my personality, I am hard-working, communicate and
I
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
have the ability to get
along with
 different types of people.
Furthermore
, I have already had some experience which is closely linked with hosting the same events in another country and the customers were delighted to see me as manager of it because of my soft skills which allows me to get on with everyone. I look forward to hearing from you. Yours faithfully, Ignat Bern
Submitted by yauhen.ilyushenka on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure the letter is well-organized with clear paragraphing. Each paragraph should focus on a single idea or aspect of the request.
coherence cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices (such as linking words, pronouns, and conjunctions) to help the reader follow the logical flow of the letter.
coherence cohesion
Avoid grammatical errors and ensure that sentences are complete and formally structured.
task achievement
Fully address all parts of the prompt, offering specific details and examples to back up your points.
task achievement
Maintain a consistent and appropriate tone throughout the letter, matching the formality of the context.
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