The bar chart below shows the estimated sales of Jeans for two companies next year in Turkey.The pie chart shows the projected market share of the two companies in Jeans at the end of next year.

#bar #sales #jeans #two #companies #year #turkey #market

The bar chart illustrates the information about the expected

sales

of Jeans for two companies called

Mango

group and Jack and

Jones

company

Correct article usage

the next

show examples

term in Turkey.

While

the given pie chart provides

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

data about their predicted retail stake in the coming

period

Overall

, the total

sales

of Jack and

Jones

group are forecast to increase more than the

mango

throughout the

period

. At the same time, Jack and Jone's team

also

look forward to holding half proportion of the total retail stake in the

year. During the

period

, both companies'

sales

awaited to increase sharply. Among them, Jack and

Jones

sales

than

mango

Correct article usage

the mango

show examples

association. Despite some fluctuations, the Jack and

Jones

sale anticipated

growing

Change the verb form

to grow

show examples

sharply from 450,000

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

pairs (January) to 900,000 pairs (December). Even though the

mango

company

hope for gradual growth, surprisingly, their

sales

predicted

Add a missing verb

are predicted

show examples

to cross over the

sales

of the other

company

with 450000 and 500,000 respectively.

While

the

mango

company

looks ahead to hold 2/10th of the total retail proportion 20% compared to Jack and

Jones

(with 50%). During the following

period

, Other

companies

Change noun form

company's

companies'

show examples

market share is around 30%.

Submitted by sarath.n.s.65918 on Wed May 06 2020

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "next, while".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words sales, mango, jones, company, period with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.

▼

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

191 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The bar chart below shows the estimated sales of Jeans for two companies next year in Turkey.The pie chart shows the projected market share of the two companies in Jeans at the end of next year.

Most young people without a partner would prefer to have a boyfriend or girlfriend. Yet being in a relationship when you are young is not always a good idea. As part of a class project, write about whether you agree or disagree. Give reasons for your choices.

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A lot of companies and organizations require employees to wear uniforms. Which kind of jobs are uniforms suitable for? Are there any disadvantages to wearing a uniform to work?

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