Some people think that music plays an important role in society. Others, however, disagree and say that music is merely a form of entertainment. Discuss both views and state your own opinion.

#people #music #role #society #form #entertainment

Nowadays there are many people who cannot imagine their

life

without

music

: for some of them

music

is a hobby, a

way

to express their thoughts or even a career.

Nevertheless

, others argue that

music

is used only for

entertainment

purposes. On the one hand,

music

is a career of full value. It plays an essential part in singers` and musicians`

life

, they say

music

makesis

Suggestion

makes is

make their emotional conditions better, and they simply cannot work without

music

Moreover

, a

person

can convey some feelings, thoughts or values to a the public through

music

. Since

music

can impact on

person

's feeling, many people, being upset, listen to

music

in order to improve their mood, get distracted or

being one more than one

two

just to be lost in thoughts.

On the other hand

, it is argued that

music

is just a form of

entertainment

and nothing more. To some extent it is true, since the majority of people use

music

to have some fun and do not see any deep sense in it: they do not even think about the meaning of

lyrics

Suggestion

the lyrics

of the song, they just like the

way

how it sounds. In my opinion, it depends on a particular

person whether

Accept comma addition

person, whether

music

plays an important role in society or not. Actually, for some people

music

is just a

way

to have fun and nothing more.

However

, there are many musicians and singers, for whom

music

is an essential part of their

life

Moreover

, many people find

music

as a perfect

way

to express their thoughts and relax or,

instead

, get some motivation and energy.

Therefore

, it cannot be said that

music

is just a form of

entertainment

. In conclusion,

music

undoubtedly plays at least an insignificant role in the

life

of every

person

However

, whether

this

role is crucial, or

music

is just a

way

entertainment

depends on a particular

person

Submitted by sawyer.yana on Wed May 06 2020

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Fully explain your ideas

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

311 words

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.5

Complete response

4.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that music plays an important role in society. Others, however, disagree and say that music is merely a form of entertainment. Discuss both views and state your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Modern lifestyle is completely different from the way people lived in the past. Some people think that the changes have been very positive while some others believe they have negative.

The diagram below shoes the process of using water to produce electricity.

The use of mobile phones is as antisocial as smoking. Smoking is banned in certain places so mobile phones should be banned like smoking. To what extent do you agree or disagree?