It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour to children? To what extend do you agree or disagreewith this opinion?

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It is debated by many that juveniles should be educated by punishing them as it is required to support their learning. I agree with
this
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point to some extent and I will explain
further
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in
this
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essay the reasons. On one hand, punishment is a vigorous method for children who do not wish to listen to their
parents
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,
teachers
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or the elderly in general. Many
parents
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think limiting their screen timings, giving
kids
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detention not to go out or
teachers
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giving unnecessary loads of homework to get their attention. Some
kids
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forfeit their stubbornness and listen to their
parents
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while
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others think
this
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is unfair so they continue doing more.
For instance
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, one study shows, that
kids
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who were punished hold more grudges toward their elderly.
On the other hand
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, if the
kids
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do not listen to their
parents
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or
teachers
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, another method could be to show them their mistakes by letting them experience the mistake or simply by persuading them towards the right way. Some
kids
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could be more rebellious than others and to prevent their future mistakes
parents
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and
teachers
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could use simple but effective punishments. To give an example, if a kid throws garbage on the floor he could be first warned and if he still insists on doing it he could be punished by letting him research about the environment and giving him cleaning detention for a week.
To conclude
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, many methods could be debatable on how to teach a kid good manners but in my opinion,
kids
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should not be completely limited or have extreme detentions. They should be allowed to make mistakes in order to learn from their misconception.

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Task Response
Your introduction could be more engaging. Consider rephrasing it to capture attention better and clearly outline your position.
Coherence and Cohesion
In your body paragraphs, ensure each point is well-developed and clearly linked to your central argument about punishment and learning.
Task Response
Try to provide more balanced examples that illustrate the effectiveness of different methods of teaching good behavior, including non-punitive measures.
Coherence and Cohesion
You have presented a clear opinion and structured your essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
Task Response
Your essay includes relevant examples and demonstrates an understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • instilling
  • moral values
  • discipline
  • verbal warnings
  • time-outs
  • constructive methods
  • positive reinforcement
  • reward systems
  • psychological effects
  • foster
  • resentment
  • modeling
  • physical punishment
  • emotional well-being
  • balance
  • understanding
  • long term effects
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