IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

In many countries schools have severe problems with students behaviour. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

#countries #schools #students #behaviour
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Education establishments, each year, are gaining new students with various characteristics from different family and combine them in
one
Use synonyms
 group with
one
Use synonyms
 method of education
accordingly
Linking Words
 gain unpredictable consequence.
Therefore
Linking Words
, I think a main reason for behaviour problems is difference among students in
one
Use synonyms
 group, whereas as a solution could be coordinator, who separate pupils for their characteristics and will be solving problems that happens outside classrooms.
Firstly
Linking Words
, few people can deny the fact that main reasons is society that has many problems with tolerance and upbringing in families, and
this
Linking Words
 is the most evident among children. Because pupils have always been bringing problems and knowledge from home, thereby some could be calm and quiet and do not treat other children, while others are everywhere mischievous.
For example
Linking Words
, with growth of immigration has been growing problems with tolerance among citizens and foreigners that start from parents and have been bringing pupils in the school.
Likewise
Linking Words
, all countries has the rich and poor people;
however
Linking Words
, in some countries, both segments are studying together that creates occasionally problems too.
Therefore
Linking Words
, a possible solution is hiring of a coordinator it is persons with psychologist diploma, who separate students by groups on their characteristics and are observing situations at recess.
For instance
Linking Words
, in Ukraine in educational establishments during breaks are happening the most problems among students because nobody adjusts their behaviour outside classrooms.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, during lessons because of all pupils in
one
Use synonyms
 group are different while
one
Use synonyms
 attempt to listen another disrupts lessons. To conclude, on my opinion, educational establishments have many behaviour problems without
one
Use synonyms
 perfect solution.
Consequently
Linking Words
, each educational building would have to elaborate own plan to solve
such
Linking Words
 problems, which involve parents, who play
initially
Linking Words
 an essential role in upbringing of children.
Submitted by ilua.cavchuk on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: