IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

the table below gives information on the proportion of carbohydrates,protein and fat in three different diets.

the table below gives information on the proportion of carbohydrates,protein and fat in three different diets.
The information illustrated in the three pie charts
make
Change the verb form
makes
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comparisions
Correct your spelling
comparisons
 the
precentage
Correct your spelling
percentage
 of
carbohydtrates
Correct your spelling
carbohydrates
,protein
as well as
Linking Words
 fat falling
in to
Join the words
into
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 three separate diets. when looking at the graph,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 sportspeople
needs
Change the verb form
need
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 a healthy
diet
Use synonyms
 with
higher
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a higher
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 ratio of
carbihydtares
Correct your spelling
carbohydrates
 than an average
diet
Use synonyms
 and
healthy
Correct article usage
a healthy
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diet
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
for
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 people who don't participate in sports,
whereas
Linking Words
 the proportion of fat
vice
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is vice
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 versa. To be more specific,the rate of
carbihydtares
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carbohydrates
 in
healthy
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a healthy
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 meal for sport make up the highest,reaching a
prevelent
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prevalent
prevalence
 level of 60% .
This
Linking Words
 is
six - five
Correct your spelling
six-five
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 compared to that of a usual healthy
diet
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 and
third
Linking Words
-two in
compartion
Correct your spelling
comparison
 with that of an average
diet
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, in place of
for
Change preposition
apply
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people
plays
Wrong verb form
playing
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sport
Add an article
a sport
the sport
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,
average
Correct article usage
an average
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diet
Use synonyms
 and healthy
diet
Use synonyms
 with fat for normal people are more favourited . one of the considerable points ,
a
Add a missing verb
is a
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similar proportion of fat in
average
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the average
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diet
Use synonyms
 and healthy
diet
Use synonyms
,at 20%.
Besides
Linking Words
, the ratio of protein consumed
go
Correct subject-verb agreement
goes
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 up gradually from 25% in
healthy
Add an article
a healthy
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diet
Use synonyms
 for sportspeople to 40% in an average
diet
Use synonyms
.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words diet with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • proportion
  • carbohydrates
  • protein
  • fat
  • diet
  • nutrition
  • balanced diet
  • energy intake
  • high-protein
  • benefits
  • drawbacks
  • health effects
  • saturated fats
  • unsaturated fats
  • suitability
  • fitness goals
  • health conditions
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