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Writing Samples
Band 5

Young people have attitude and ideas different from that of their parents and grandparents. How do these attitudes differ between young people and their parents and grandparents? In your opinion, do you think it would cause problems?

#people #attitude #parents #grandparents #attitudes
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Use synonyms
Generation gap
Suggestion
The generation gap
 between young people and elderly
Use synonyms
generation including
Accept comma addition
generation, including
 their parents and baby
boomer
Suggestion
Boomer
 has become wider
as a result
Linking Words
 of differences attitudes and ideas. Nowadays, lacking of understanding in
family
Suggestion
the family
 has spread into every
countries
Suggestion
country
 so spreading time together to do
a
Suggestion
an
 activity
such
Linking Words
 as watching television and having a chat among family is decreasing significantly.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss what are the differences between these two generations and what problems might be caused.
First
Linking Words
 of all, advancement in technology has lead to a
generation
Use synonyms
 gap in
this
Linking Words
 modern world which is a main reason of
this
Linking Words
 problem. Children tend to spend most of their leisure time with
this
Linking Words
 technology
devices including
Accept comma addition
devices, including
 computer and mobile phone so
child
Suggestion
the child
children
 would not discuss any problems with their parents and grandparents.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, elderly people when they have problems would discuss and consult with someone who has more experience. Another difference that we could see clearly is the view on work.
young
(used of living things especially persons) in an early period of life or development or growth
Young
 people would like to be
owner
Suggestion
owned
 business while most of elderly people thought
that being employee
Suggestion
that being an employee
that being employed
that being employed employed
 has more secure in term of income and
stable
Suggestion
stability
.
Thus
Linking Words
, when these two
group
Suggestion
groups
 of people have a discussion about work, they all are totally different view on work. All of the differences idea and attitudes between young people and their parents have caused a lot of problems.
Firstly
Linking Words
, children
start
Suggestion
starts
 to not obey their parents and ignore their value time with family.
Secondly
Linking Words
, a lack of having a chat in family cause a stress level and stressful is the root of many health problems. To sum up,
this
Linking Words
 essay
discuss
Suggestion
discusses
 what are the
differences ideas and
Suggestion
differences in ideas and
 attitudes between young and old people and what
problem
Suggestion
problems
the problem
 may be caused
from
Suggestion
by
 the difference. From my perspective,
this
Linking Words
 problem should be solved by listening
for
Suggestion
to
 each other so a
generation
Use synonyms
 gap would become smaller.
young
(used of living things especially persons) in an early period of life or development or growth
Young
generation
Use synonyms
 should
listen their parents
Suggestion
listen to their parents
 and their parents
also
Linking Words
 have to accept what generations like, want and need.
Submitted by tle_sittinukulchai on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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