With the rapid advancement of communication technology such as smart phones, tablets and other mobile devices, some people believe that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#advancement #communication #technology #phones #tablets #devices #people

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It is often argued that education is required to live our life better. Some people might think that it is significant to learn their home country’s

literature

rather than studying other nation’s subjects.

Although

focusing on their own country is necessary, I strongly disagree with

this

opinion.

This

essay will address the perspective of studying

literature

First

of all, the globalization in modern society.

In other words

, all people around the world live the global community because they are able to interact

Suggestion

with

other country’s inhabitants constantly, so learning own nation’s subjects might look old-fashioned.

For example

, when students do not concentrate on the international

literature

, they are isolated globally because communicating

Suggestion

with

different countries would be a good chance to know their traditional studying which is the good way to be knowledgeable.

Therefore

, young people nowadays might not focus on the outdated education.

Moreover

, in spite of the fact that learning home country is

needed it

Accept comma addition

needed, it

is good for career to study abroad. When people study other nation’s subjects they might have a variety of opportunities to have a job internationally.

For instance

, students study abroad, they would have a chance to experience the other country’s culture which is useful and helpful when they interview for

job

Suggestion

the job

a job

jobs

because they are so experienced through studying abroad.

Furthermore

, abroad experiences might help their career to have jobs. In conclusion, traditional education might need when it comes to studying own culture’s

subjects but

Accept comma addition

subjects, but

we need to encourage people to educate international studying because it is more useful than home country’s

literature

Also it

Accept comma addition

Also, it

will be effective to approach other nation’s culture for their future life so they should prepare it in advance.

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

280 words

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With the rapid advancement of communication technology such as smart phones, tablets and other mobile devices, some people believe that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To wht extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

some places old age is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important. Disscuss both views and give your opinion

With recent developments in technology like e-books, some people feel that printed media like books, newspaper and magazines will soon be a thing of the past. Others feel that these forms of media will never disappear. What is your opinion?

Some employers involve employees in the decision-making process of products and services. What are the advantages and disadvantages?