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Writing Samples
Band 4

Some say that people living in high-rise apartments are lonely and unhappy, while others say that it is advantageous to stay in high-rise apartments. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#say #people #apartments
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Undoubtedly, in past time individuals did not live in
Use synonyms
apartment but
Suggestion
an apartment, but
an apartment but
the apartment but
apartments but
 nowadays
people mainly
Accept comma addition
people, mainly
 like to live in
Use synonyms
apartment
Suggestion
an apartment
the apartment
apartments
.
Accept space
.
 Few humans deem that people are unhappy and lonely who are living in
high -rise
Suggestion
a high - rise apartment
apartment
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
,
other
plural of other; the people or things not already mentioned
others
 believe that there are so many merits of staying in
high- rise appartment
Suggestion
a high - rise apartment
high - rise apartment
high - rise apartments
. I agree with
latter view point
Suggestion
the latter view point
.
Accept space
.
 I will discuss both views in
upcoming paragraphs
Suggestion
the upcoming paragraphs
. There are
upmteen
innumerable but many
umpteen
advantage
Suggestion
advantages
.
Accept space
.
First
Linking Words
 and foremost, in
apartment
Use synonyms
 lot of facilities are available as
apartment
Use synonyms
 provides security guard by
this
Linking Words
 not outsider is
enter
Suggestion
entered
 without the permission
.
Accept space
.
 So, high -rise
apartment
Use synonyms
 is very helpful for professional people and they can live safe life.
Moreover
Linking Words
, people
fulfill
put in effect
fulfil
 their dream through
apartment
Use synonyms
 because some individuals do not able to make own house and attached new facilities
,
Accept space
,
while in high rise
apartment
Use synonyms
 they enjoy all advantage like big garden and swimming pool
,
Accept space
,
air conditioning room and so on. On the other hand, some individuals say that there are
lotof
Suggestion
a lot of
lot of
lots of
 demerits.
First
Linking Words
 of all, they think that people in own houses mainly humans live in
other
any of various alternatives; some other
another
 environment in which people are busy
in
Suggestion
at
with
 work and
no body
a person of no influence
nobody
 have time to meet with each other and apartments always choose small family
.
Accept space
.
So
,
Accept space
,
they live under stress and
a lone
without any others being included or involved
alone
. To conclude, different individuals have different
thinking but
Accept comma addition
thinking, but
 I opine that high rise
apartment
Use synonyms
 is very
fruitfull
feeling or showing gratitude
grateful
 for all
that is
Linking Words
 the best choice of
person
Suggestion
the person
.
Submitted by neersonu.02 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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