In many countries, the governments likes to spend more money on the arts. Some people agree with this. However, others think government should spend more on health and education. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

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Arts
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
financed by the authorities worldwide more than other areas and some
people
support it.
However
Add a comma
However,
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some others argue that
healthcare
and
education
systems have to be funded by the government more than
arts
Correct article usage
the arts
show examples
and I think that governments should allot equal
founds
Correct your spelling
funds
show examples
for
arts
as well as
healthcare
Correct article usage
the healthcare
show examples
and
education
Fix the agreement mistake
systems
show examples
system
.
This
essay will discuss
the
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apply
show examples
both sides of the argument, show the reason supported by the relevant examples and give the conclusion. On the one side of the argument, some
people
think that it is important to provide
arts
with more funds than health and
education
.
Firstly
, art has a great impact on
people
’s cultural development and
also
it extends their knowledge.
For example
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cultural institutions
such
as museums, galleries and theatres not only make
people
more culturally aware but
also
increase
people
’s knowledge in the field of history.
Secondly
, the
arts
have a positive effect on the economic progress of countries.
For instance
, music concerts, exhibitions and local museums attract bunches of tourists from other countries who wish to explore foreign
culture
Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
show examples
.
Therefore
, the money that comes from ticket sales
contribute
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contributes
show examples
to the economic development of a country. On the other side of the argument, there are
people
who think that more funds ought to be spent on
healthcare
and
education
Correct article usage
the education
show examples
system
.
Firstly
, the more developed
healthcare
system
a country has, the healthier its population is.
For instance
, financial support allows hospitals to import or create new medical equipment as well as supports scientists in conducting medical studies and developing vaccines and treatments.
Secondly
, a better
education
system
results in more
people
getting good qualifications and,
consequently
,
benefit
Correct subject-verb agreement
benefits
show examples
to a country’s welfare and success.
For example
, a well-developed
education
system
gives
people
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
possibility to take part in the development process in various fields including medicine,
arts
and politics.
To sum up
, many governments all around the globe tend to spend more money on
arts
and there are some
people
who support
this
tendency.
However
, others think that
healthcare
Correct article usage
the healthcare
show examples
and
education
system
need to get more funding from authorities. After discussing both sides of
this
issue, I think that
education
,
healthcare
and
arts
should be financed by governments in equal share because each of
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
fields brings many significant benefits to
social
Add an article
the social
show examples
and economic welfare of a country.
Submitted by shchugarev on

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • enriches
  • cultural heritage
  • national identity
  • stimulate tourism
  • mental health benefits
  • therapy
  • stress relief
  • sense of community
  • prioritizing
  • strong foundation
  • socio-economic development
  • disease prevention
  • life expectancy
  • employment opportunities
  • fundamental rights
  • healthcare
  • allocation
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