Many people think happiness relies upon the responsibility of individuals, others think that is affected by other factors. Discuss both views and state your opinion

#people #happiness #responsibility #individuals #factors

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People have different views on factors which

effect

the conscious subjective aspect of feeling or emotion

affect

the happiness. In my opinion, an individual can stay happy irrespective of the obstacles in

life

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. In the contemporary era, it is very difficult to achieve self content in

life

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This

Linking Words

means that the person’s emotions is not attached to any materialistic things

life

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fortune, wealth etc.

Moreover

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, they may be able to conquer the obstacles in their journey of

life

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Such

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people live an ascetic

life

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and has a very minimalistic approach towards living.

Hence

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, their emotions are not

effected

acted upon; influenced

affected

and they have a complete control on it.

For example

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, in India there are

group

Suggestion

a group

of Monks who have donated their wealths but they still enjoy their

life

Use synonyms

peacefully.

On the other hand

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, one evident factor, which people believe effects prosperity is to possess a lot of wealth.

This

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is because there is a belief that money can buy happiness. To elaborate, the basic standard of living is not possible to achieve without the money.

Secondly

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, most people attach their prosperity with the achievements in

life

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For instance

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, a student may find prosperity in achieving

Linking Words

first rank

Suggestion

the first rank

in school. All the material factor

have

Suggestion

has

a negative impact on an individual because his happiness is tied to a condition where if it is not fulfilled he may get into depression. According to a recent study, people whose emotions are

effected

acted upon; influenced

affected

by outside factors tend to be anxious in nature. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

a goal in

life

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is important as it motivates an individual to perform

well but

Accept comma addition

well, but

the emotions should be in control of an individual.

Submitted by sjdfljksdf on Fri May 15 2020

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

264 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

individual responsibility
personal mindset
proactive steps
self-improvement
socio-economic status
relationships
environmental conditions
external factors
positive attitude
pursuit of happiness
facilitate
hamper
proactive engagement
sense of achievement
conducive environment

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Many people think happiness relies upon the responsibility of individuals, others think that is affected by other factors. Discuss both views and state your opinion

Some university students wan to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Technology is becoming increasingly prevalent in the world today. In the not-too-distant future, technology will completely replace the teacher in the classroom. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

according to raise population, government have to find alterantive food resource like insects product in order to strike balance betwenn supply and demand while group of people have notion that consuming its is not appropriate for human health and having hazardous effect on environment.

some people said professionals such as doctors or engineers should be required to work in the country where they did their training while other said they should be free to work in another country Task :

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