Childhood obesity is an increasing problem in Australia. As many as two thirds of the children are now obese. Schools have a responsibility to monitor what their students eat and the amount of exercise they do. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

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Obesity is becoming a problematic issue in young
generation especially
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generation, especially
in Australia, where% of the young generation are obese. In believe of some
school
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should take charge of it by recording about children’s eating habits and their physical
activeness
Suggestion
activity
.
This
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essay discusses why I completely agree with
this
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phrase because
school
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’s
life
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is a major part of child’s
life
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.
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.
The main reason why Australian schools should monitor what children eat and exercise is because students spend almost of their valuable time of
life
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in
school
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. Children not only stay in
school
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at their breakfast and lunch
time but
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time, but
also
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eat junk
food
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from cafes and canteens available there. A recent study states that
school
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children eat 80% of their daily
food
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requirements during
school
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hours. It is
also
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mentioned that kids intake about two
third
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part of their
food
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within 8 hours after wakeup
.
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.
Therefore
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, parents will have the knowledge of what all should they do, if
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school’s record
Suggestion
the school’s record
about kids eating and physical
activities
Suggestion
activity
details. It is definitely
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school’s responsibility
Suggestion
the school’s responsibility
to maintain a record that how much a child eats in proportionate to it
,
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,
has he played enough sports? The
secondary but
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secondary, but
also
Linking Words
very essential reason
Suggestion
a very essential reason
why
school
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should meddle with student’s diet and exercise is because it can have positive
pschycological
mental or emotional as opposed to physical in nature
psychological
impacts on the students themselves. Since, teachers are the role models for kids
,
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,
if they tell children about the pros and cons; advantages and disadvantages of eating unhealthy
food
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in addition
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of healthy eating habits
,
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,
children will change their way of looking
food
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only in terms of eating and taste. An experiment was done in a secondary
school
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at Texas by initiating these talks in their daily routine for 10 minutes and discussing what all each kid eats in a day
,
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,
in order to that, they
also
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changed menu of café by
provided
Suggestion
providing
healthy
food
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,
this
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not only transformed the way of eating of children
,
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,
but
also
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while the experiment children forced their parents to eat and cook healthy which lead 70% weight loss of overweight kids. Certainly, it is good idea.
This
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essay discussed why schools should be a part in
prevention
Suggestion
the prevention
of
this
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preventable disease because students spend half of the time at
school
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for about 11 years and it may affect children to
adapt
choose and follow; as of theories, ideas, policies, strategies or plans
adopt
healthy
life
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. In my opinion, I completely agree with the proposition that childhood obesity is
responsibility
Suggestion
the responsibility
of
Use synonyms
school
Suggestion
the school
schools
.
Submitted by setia.mehak on

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    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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