IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The first chart below shows how energy is used in an average Australian household. The second chart shows the greenhouse gas emissions which result from this energy use. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The first chart below shows how energy is used in an average Australian household. The second chart shows the greenhouse gas emissions which result from this energy use. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
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The charts illustrate the average Australian household’s usage of
energy
Use synonyms
 and the emissions of
greenhouse
Use synonyms
gas
Use synonyms
 that
results
Correct subject-verb agreement
result
show examples
 from it respectively. The operations in both graphs are given in percentages.
Overall
Linking Words
,
according to
Linking Words
 the
charts
Add a comma
,charts
show examples
 the main
energy
Use synonyms
 user in Australian
home
Fix the agreement mistake
homes
show examples
 is the heating
while
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
water heating emits the biggest percentage of
greenhouse
Use synonyms
gas
Use synonyms
. Only a tiny fraction of
energy
Use synonyms
 and
greenhouse
Use synonyms
gas
Use synonyms
emission
Fix the agreement mistake
emissions
show examples
 comes from the cooling operation. It can be clearly seen that Australians use 42% of
Use synonyms
energy
Correct pronoun usage
their energy
show examples
 on heating which results in as less as 15% of
gas
Use synonyms
emission
Fix the agreement mistake
emissions
show examples
. Water heating utilizes exactly 30% of the
energy
Use synonyms
 and releases nearly a
third
Linking Words
 of the
greenhouse
Use synonyms
gas
Use synonyms
 (32%). The lowest percentage of
energy
Use synonyms
 (2%) and
greenhouse
Use synonyms
gas
Use synonyms
 (3%) accounts for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cooling. The charts show
also
Linking Words
 that refrigeration, other appliances and lighting which utilize roughly a quarter of the
energy
Use synonyms
 (7%,15% and 4% respectively) are contributing to exactly
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
half of the
greenhouse
Use synonyms
gas
Use synonyms
 emissions (14%, 28% and 8%
accordingly
Linking Words
).

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Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, greenhouse, gas with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 3 times.
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