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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Write essays on the following topics: Is money the most important thing in life?

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Money
 is certainly something which is often discussed in today's world. Hardly a day goes by without the subject of
money
 being raised in most people's lives.
However
, it is highly debatable whether it is more important than other considerations,
such
 as
health
 and
happiness
, which some people consider to be of greater significance.
To begin
 with, it is often argued that having
money
 enables people to exert influence over others. Wealthy businessmen,
for example
, are often the most highly respected members of society, and business tycoons are often consulted by world leaders, who
then
 make policies which affect the whole population. As a consequence,
money
 can be seen as the single most important factor in our daily lives.
Secondly
, from the point of view of the individual,
money
 is vital for survival. Our society is structured in
such
 a way that, without
money
, people are deprived of the means to obtain proper nutrition and
health
 care.
Furthermore
, in some cases where state benefits are inadequate, the inability to pay heating bills can indeed become a matter of life and death.
This
 is clearly illustrated by the fact that, according to Social Services, the majority of deaths due to hypothermia each winter occur among low-income groups.
On the other hand
, many people claim that undoubtedly
health
 is of greater importance than
money
. Izaak Walton said “
health
 is a blessing that
money
 cannot buy.” What is more,
money
 is of little consolation to those who are suffering from
health
 problems. Despite the fact that
money
 can pay for the best medical treatment and care available,
this
 is no guarantee of a longer life.
In addition
, most people would agree that personal
happiness
 easily outweighs
money
Suggestion
the money
 in importance. Even if an individual is extremely rich,
this
 does not necessarily lead to
happiness
. In some cases, the contrary is true and vast wealth brings with it a whole range of problems and insecurities. Genuine
happiness
 cannot be bought and does not usually have anything to do with financial status.
Submitted by xoz52894 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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