IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn and relearn. Agree or disagree?

#st #century #unlearn #relearn
Can you imagine the world without education in nowadays
?
Accept space
?
I think it would be difficult
,
Accept space
,
people would seem like animals
.
Accept space
.
One of the best process is learning something new
.
Accept space
.
We have to learn every day because everything is changing by the day.
Also we
Accept comma addition
Also, we
 can find people without knowledge and we call them as an illiterate.
Even meaning
Suggestion
The Even meaning
 of
this
 word changed as Alvin Toffler said the illiterate of the 21th century will not be those who cannot read or write
,
Accept space
,
but those who cannot learn
,
Accept space
,
unlearn and relearn
.
Accept space
.
I absolutely agree with
this
 statement, because everything
is enable
Suggestion
enables
 to learn
.
Accept space
.
In addition
, the world changing
as
Suggestion
at
 a speed of light
.
Accept space
.
It happened of course by virtue modern technology. By using modern things learning became really easy,
also
, it has effects on employment.
For instance
, if we do not know
definition
Suggestion
the definition
a definition
 or
translation
Suggestion
the translation
 of words, it is not
problem
Suggestion
a problem
,
Accept space
,
we do not have to look up from
dictionary
Suggestion
the dictionary
,
Accept space
,
we just click online translator and get our result. One more example, If we want to eat or we do not know how to cook, we can open YOU TUBE and look there we can find
collection
Suggestion
a collection
 of receipts and master classes
,
Accept space
,
Instead
 of going to cooking courses. Learning by modern technology made one thing, it is
online shopping
Suggestion
an online shopping
 and many malls
,
Accept space
,
stores require employers who familiar with internet knowledge
.
Accept space
.
However we
Accept comma addition
However, we
 can meet people who cannot write and read, despite
this
 they want to learn new things
.
Accept space
.
These people can always survive in every situation by their talent or techniques. Here I want
give
Suggestion
to give
 one example
from
Suggestion
of
 school life. At school there students who know everything and who get
high grade
Suggestion
high grades
a high grade
,
also
,
there
of them or themselves
their
 students who are not good at subjects
.
Accept space
.
The searches showed that these students who were not good at subjects have more probability being successful than
honor
bestow honor or rewards upon
honour
 students. It is right because that students who cannot study well
,
Accept space
,
they fail many times
,
Accept space
,
then
 learn to survive.
Also they
Accept comma addition
Also, they
 learn to make good communication by cheating and so on. To sum up, I want to say education is
treasure
Suggestion
a treasure
 which we can save forever. I
also
 think the person who cannot learn ready thing is real illiterate
.
Accept space
.
Never stop learning because It is never stops teaching.
Submitted by tashbolotjumagul on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: