Many agricultural lands are being converted into commercial centres. How does this affect the environment and the people’s life style? Discuss this situation and provide suggestions to address these issues. Support your answer with specific reasons and examples.

#lands #centres #affect #environment #people’s #life #style #situation #suggestions #address #support

In recent decades, we are facing many environmental issues. One of them is that a lot of

lands

Suggestion

land

for agriculture are being transformed to commercial places. Actually, from what I experienced, the town I live in was agricultural lands. But it was converted into residential, facilities and shopping malls due to the benefit of the money value.

However to

Suggestion

However, in

However in

my mind, I think that the drawbacks overweight the benefits in

this

situation. So in

this

essay, I will suggest the problems of

this

occasion and the way to resolve them.

First

of all, the main problem is that the job for as a farmer is declined. The spaces for

farm

Suggestion

the farm

are changed to shopping malls so there

are

Suggestion

the lake of

farm

Suggestion

the farm

Finally

, it makes farmers

not to work

Suggestion

don't work

anymore. And

bigger issue

Suggestion

the bigger issue

is that it affects their lives. Because they

can not

cannot

work no more, their revenue is decreased and it makes their life hard.

In addition

, as the fruits and foods from agriculture are

also

depleted, we have to depend on more import. The solution to resolve

this

is to preserve and develop

lands

Suggestion

the lands

Consequently

, they can get the profit and the happy life.

Secondly

, it destroys the habitats for animals. As the nature

for

Suggestion

them is being converted, they lose their home.

Moreover

, it can lead to the extinction of

creatures

Suggestion

the creatures

. Actually, according to a recent study, it shows that there are many endangered animals because of

significant decline

Suggestion

a significant decline

significant declines

the significant decline

of their settles. In my thought, it can be resolved by making parks for them or preserving the nature. To make many

parks is going

Suggestion

parks, go

parks go

to help them not damaged. To sum up, I believe that to change the fields

for

Suggestion

agriculture to commercial

centers

Suggestion

centres'

bring many negative effects, so we have to preserve them.

Submitted by bjsean on Wed May 27 2020

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Fully explain your ideas

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

297 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Many agricultural lands are being converted into commercial centres. How does this affect the environment and the people’s life style? Discuss this situation and provide suggestions to address these issues. Support your answer with specific reasons and examples.

Fully explain your ideas

Some museum charge entry fees while others have free entry. Do you think the advantages of charging an entry fee outweight the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples from your own knowledge or experiences.

Both government and individual are spending vast amount of money protecting animals and their habitats. This money could be better spent dealing with fundamental issues in society such as poverty and healthcare. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

More and more people tend to watch foreign movies, so the local government should encourage the development of local film industry. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

You want to complain about the service that you received in the hotel you stayed in while attending a recent meeting. Write a letter to the person who organized the meeting. In the letter Describe the meeting Explain the problems with the service Suggest what the meeting organizer should do.