Due to so many young people dropping out from schools, the rate of unemployment is increasing and it affects our society in different ways. In your opinion, how can this situation be improved?

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Unemployment
rates, nowadays, on the rise, as
this
is affecting to the society to a large extent. The reason for
this
is that, dropping out from schools have become commonplace among people. From my perspective,
this
issue can easily be improved by changing teaching methods at schools and providing a chance for pupils to enrol with their favourite activities at schools. Undeniably, almost all traditional teaching methods have become so boring and complex for students, as they are required to deal with certain unwanted activities or subjects at schools, for the most part. To be precise, these methods do not take into account the inner ability and potential of each student, I think.
Therefore
, it seems sensible to me that, old teaching styles should urgently be altered by new and more interactive one, which can take into account students' abilities. By doing so, people are unlikely to give up their
education
, which can, in turn, reduce the rates of
unemployment
in the society. According to the latest research conducted by the International
Education
Board under the United Nations, Finland has already overcome
this
issue by shifting their whole
education
system to the new one, which decreased the
unemployment
figures and the rates of dropping out of
school
during very short time.
Moreover
, almost all schools tend to strictly control their pupils, which can make students deprived of their freedom. Precisely students can not do activities or enrol with the subjects of their interest, in which they are likely to be successful. In
this
case, students are,
therefore
, highly likely to fed up with their
school
simply give up their
education
, believe.
For example
. Founder of world-famous Apple Corporation Steve Jobs,
also
dropped from his
school
to open himself a chance of doing more practical activities and tasks
instead
of learning general theories in various other subjects, which he actually not interested in. In my opinion,
this
negative side of
school
education
directly causes emerging of
this
unemployment
problem. In conclusion, to decrease the numbers of students who
unfinish
their
school
education
and
unemployment
rates, schools should be completely changed
for
Suggestion
to
the advantage of students, I opine.
Submitted by sabdulabbosov on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

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To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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