IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Describe the chart that shows reasons which made people move to capital city

Describe the chart that shows reasons which made people move to capital city
The chart demonstrates the outcome of a survey relating to some main factors that made people
decided
Wrong verb form
decide
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 to move to the municipality.
overall
Linking Words
, all of
reasons
Add an article
the reasons
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 that the survey gave rose in the initial period but
then
Linking Words
 the
employment's
Change noun form
employment
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 factor went in a different way compared to others. in 2000, employment was
a
Change the article
the
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 biggest reason to explain why people moved to
capital
Add an article
the capital
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 city, about 60,000 people. in the
next
Linking Words
 following years, employment and study
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 2 of the main problems that forced many individuals to move up to the municipality.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 73%.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "move" was used 3 times.
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