Some people think that children’s free time must include educational activities otherwise they will waste their time. What is your opinion?

Many people opine that the student's free
time
should be used for extra classes so that their valuable
time
does not waste.
However I
Accept comma addition
However, I
do not accord with
this
notion that they completely
induldge
give free rein to
indulge
their self into study only. They should spend free
time
on
activity
Suggestion
an activity
like sports
,
Accept space
,
extra
curriculm
an integrated course of academic studies
curriculum
acivites
put in motion or move to act
activates
and joining different club related to dance and music. The following treatise will explicit the reasons behind the same. The
first
and foremost reason is that, undoubtedly study plan an important role in individual's life.
Nevertheless in
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Nevertheless, in
today's era where the competitions are cut throat, parents pay more attention towards the education of children than any other activity. To enhance the persona of a
children
Suggestion
child
extra activities are
also
required. It
boost
Suggestion
boosts
their physical and mental
helalth
a healthy state of wellbeing free from disease
health
,
moreover
make them confident. Free
time
activity
teach
Suggestion
teaches
them other
valueable
having great material or monetary value especially for use or exchange
valuable
things, which they do not learn in school. To exemplify
this
, it can be stated that through these leisure
activites
any specific behavior
activities
they learn the value of sharing and how to adjust with different kind of people. Another
compeling
driving or forcing
compelling
arguments
Suggestion
argument
in
this
is that children do learn what a win-win situation mean. Competition
teach
Suggestion
teaches
them how to do work hard for the things the need and how to fight with the difficult situations,
moreover
they learn to react in failure.
For instance
,
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,
in
today
Suggestion
today's
life style parents have one or two kids at home and due to nuclear
family they
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family, they
do not learn the value of things because they get it so easily.
Therfore they
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Therefore, they
Therefore they
do not learn the value of competition. To recapitulate
,
Accept space
,
after contemplating it can be stated that
,
Accept space
,
study teach
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study, teach
them how to be a good
citizen but
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citizen, but
it does not teach how to share, how to fight and how to take failures.
thus
Suggestion
Thus
the free
time
should be used for extra activities.
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    • Sentence 2 - Example
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
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