Some Believe That People Should Not Continue To Work Once They Reach The Age Of Retirement Until what age individuals should perform their duties is a debatable issue; it is argued by many people that individuals should stop working once they reach the age of retirement. This essay strongly supports this view as this will greatly benefits an individual to stay blissful and motivated.

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Until what age individuals should work is a debatable issue; it is argued by many people that individuals should stop working once they reach the youth of withdrawal.

This

essay strongly supports

this

view and it will examine

this

in subsequent paragraphs. To commence with, on average, an individual works for almost twenty-five to thirty years before his or her pullout.

This

life span is quite long enough and by the time they reach the age of 55 or 60 most of them have already worked hard and fulfilled their responsibilities like providing education for their children and saving enough for their withdrawal.

Therefore

, after retirement, individuals need stage for them to enjoy their growth. They should spend

this

time for travelling to new places and

also

in physical activities like Yoga and Meditation that can improve their health. To illustrate

further

, according to a recent survey by the World Health Organization, people who retire at the age of sixty and do not work after that were 30% happier than those who continue to work after evacuation.

Furthermore

, after retirement, individuals can involve themselves in taking care of their grandchildren and being a mentor to them. Senior citizens possess a vast amount of activity experience and it can best be utilised when they share it with youngsters; they can guide them in achieving their life goals.

For instance

, in our society, we have a club of retired people who help youngsters by guiding them to take the right decisions for their future. To conclude, once individuals reach the stage of retirement, they have worked enough and they should spend the rest of their lives doing activities that make them happy.

Moreover

, they can help youngsters in achieving their life goals.

Submitted by phamhoanganhhuy161 on Sun May 31 2020

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

290 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The continued rise in the world's population is the greatest problem faced by humanity at the present time. What are the causes of this continued rise? Do you agree that it is the greatest problem faced by humanity?

Some people have argued that there will be no need for art galleries in the future because people can view works of art freely on the internet. Compare and contrast the benefits of viewing art in real life with viewing it on the internet. In your opinion, which is better?

Government investment in the arts, such as music and museum, is a wast of money. Government must invest this money in public service instead. To what extend do you agree with this statement?

In some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city. Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages?