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Some people hold that children do not get as much attention from their parents as children did in the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #children #attention #parents
Currently, an increasing number of people are concerned about
children
Suggestion
child
care
, some people argue that parents pay less attention to their kids than
previous
Suggestion
the previous time
previous times
time
, I
am agree
Suggestion
agree
 with
this
 opinion, there are few reasons how does it caused.
First
 of all
,
Accept space
,
 the cost of living is likely to be much higher. Parents should pay
more higher price
Suggestion
a higher price
higher price
higher prices
highest price
 of clothing, food
,
Accept space
,
housing and school education, it makes them work
more harder
Suggestion
harder
more hard
.
However
, the social competition is
intensely
Suggestion
intensifying
intense
intensified
intensive
.
For instance
, there are a large number of candidates to apply for one position, people are under great pressure, they have to
spent
Suggestion
spend
 substantial energy into job skills which
cause
look over, usually with the intention to rob
case
them
people in general
they
 may not have more power to take
care
 of kids, give
advise
a proposal for an appropriate course of action
advice
 to
kids
Suggestion
kids'
 homework.
Secondly
, another reason is that overuse of
internet
Suggestion
the internet
. When parents have
free
Suggestion
more free
time
, they always spent it on social networking sites,
such
 as Facebook
,
Accept space
,
 Twitter, Instagram, or watch some videos from TikTok, YouTube. While the parents spent leisure
time
 on the internet
,
Accept space
,
 it means they have
lack
Suggestion
a lack
 of
time
 to spend with
kids
Suggestion
the kids
.
Furthermore
, In the past,
instead
 of working mothers are
remained
Suggestion
remaining
 at home to look after their children and take
care
 of domestic work, nowadays women
also
 have equal access to enter the workforce, on the one hand
,
Accept space
,
 it
encourage
Suggestion
encourages
 mothers to find employment, but
on the other hand
, it makes children with less
care
. In conclusion, from my perspective today children did not get enough attention from their parents, to consider about children’s development, parents should spend more
time
 with their kids.
Submitted by Sssue on

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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