The number of people suffering from health problems caused by a modern lifestyle which cannot be treated with modern medicines. Some people believe that alternative medicine can help. Do you agree that alternative medicines are effective?

Some
people
are in pain from diseases
due to
advanced living which cannot be cleansed by today’s medicines.
People
put faith in that natural
medicine
can help to cure these problems. I strongly agree with
this
idea, because the modern remedy fixes some parts and
damage
Correct subject-verb agreement
damages
show examples
other parts. I will follow
this
idea in
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
paragraphs.
To begin
with, there are a lot of pharmaceutical companies and these companies earn money from sick
people
because if they
will
Verb problem
are
show examples
not
be
Verb problem
apply
show examples
sick medical organizations will not have economic growth.
As a result
,
this
will be an inferior situation for these medical institutions,
therefore
drug companies produce medicines for one disease which
as a result
damages
other part
Change the wording
another part
other parts
show examples
of the body. But for
people
Add a comma
,
show examples
this
issue is the worst issue, the sick
people
are
Correct pronoun usage
who are
show examples
in a habit of consuming tablets and capsules
are more
Verb problem
apply
show examples
tend to lose their health.
Also
, nothing changes about general health,
furthermore
some
people
are compelled to
intake
Verb problem
take
show examples
medicine
. There is a way to get rid of
this
issue,
İt
Correct your spelling
which
is consuming
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
alternative
medicine
.
On the other hand
,
Alternative
medicine
is completely natural and there is no side effect .
Alternative
medicine
is very popular nowadays, acupuncture, fish therapy, plant treatments ,some of these, and they are very affordable
according to
modern
medicine
.
In addition
, a lot of doctors and scientists are recommending
alternative
medicine
as all of the research shows that
alternative
medicine
has complete benefits and uses.
For example
, there is research in the USA about
this
subject over 100
people
. 29
people
who use
alternative
medicine
lived more as compared to advanced
medicine
.
To conclude
,
people
need the help of
alternative
medicine
, as much as possible to mitigate health disorders.
Submitted by Jasbir kaur on

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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