IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Some young people are leaving the countryside to live in cities and towns, leaving only old people in the country side. What problems are caused by this issue? What can be done to solve this situation?

#people #countryside #cities #towns #country #side #situation
Few of the youngsters are moving to cities & towns, leaving behind their older parents to reside at
countryside
Suggestion
the countryside
.
This
 situation may arise a lot of problems for elderly people in the family,
however
, there are several solutions to it. On the one hand, while shifting to urban areas from the rural part of the country provides ample of job opportunities and financial freedom to youth, it
also arise
Suggestion
also arises
has also arisen
 so many problems for the older generation and city life. The main problem is that our old parents need their children to take care of them at
this
 age when they are not physically fit and
also
 cannot earn enough money for their well-being.
Additionally
, it
also
 reduces the chance of growth & development of
countryside
Suggestion
the countryside
 and to an extent makes cities over-crowded which results in lack of services and facilities.
On the other hand
, despite having so many issues, the situation can be controlled or tackled with few careful steps. One of the solution is that the government should arrange employment opportunities in the
countryside
 that would support the young generation's need of a good salary and lifestyle.
Consequently
, It would give them a purpose to stay in their hometowns with older parents.
Moreover
, Youngsters should
also
 be educated enough about their responsibilities that even when they go to cities in search of jobs or business, they remain in constant touch with their family.
In addition
, the Government should take necessary steps to maintain decent infrastructure and services to support
this
 need. At the end,
Although
 the youngster's migration to cities and towns have been a rising issue for the families in villages and
countryside
, better educational and job facilities would solve
this
 problem majorly.
Submitted by mohit maroo on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: