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Band 7.5

Many people think that happiness relies upon the individual, while others think it is affected by other factors. Discuss both views and state your opinion

#people #happiness #factors
A lot of individuals believe that being Joyful is a personal decision. Others,
however
, opine that it is determined by extra elements. In my opinion,
although
 contentment can be a person’s choice, I believe it could
also
 be determined by the ability to provide the key necessities in
life
. Happiness is a state of mind and could be controlled by an individual. If a person can take charge of his emotions in a good or bad situation, it might stir up a state of satisfaction.
For instance
, I have decided to put aside the daily reports of rising deaths and new infections of covid19
this
 pandemic period. I chose to focus on the increasing number of recoveries and other positive aspects of the global epidemic.
This
 choice has brought me peace, even in times of uncertainties.
Therefore
, an individual’s pleasure may depend on his centre of attention.
Conversely
, critics of
this
 opinion believe that the happiness of a person is affected by other components because gaiety is achieved when basic necessities are met. Being able to afford fundamental things in
life
 like food, shelter and clothing may bring some glee to the
life
 of an individual.
For example
, a report from the Guinness book of record 2020, states that citizens of Finland are happier because of good government and their outstanding welfare program for its nationals.
This
 has improved their quality of
life
 and left them worry- free about the future. A proof that additional positive factors elevates peoples moods. In conclusion, I agree that other elements are a major determinant to one’s delight, even though a person’s happiness may depend on his focal point.
Submitted by EJEME EIGBE on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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